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JessiLu

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JessiLu last won the day on May 5

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About JessiLu

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  1. The Desi Photo Thread

    If you're going, please report back on any insights they offer! In "The Lucy Book," Desi Jr. shared an overall positive perspective on the appearance, while Lucie watched from her mom's Aspen condo and thought it was terrible, saying she felt like they used her father and that they were kind of making fun of him.
  2. I love this series from Lucie's 1971 bridal shower luncheon because we hardly ever get to see pics of Lucy getting behind wheel, it's nice to see her with Dee Dee, and I like her classic and casual style.
  3. The Desi Photo Thread

    1976 - Edie looks great! Circa 1970 Also around 1970 Previous three photos: SNL, 1976
  4. Gary letters

    Yes, it would be interesting to know the evolution of the Roxbury house, from when they first bought it and continuing through the years. And Lucy sounds like a pretty accomodating wife if she was happy to let Gary indulge his passion for fashion. I wouldn't let any man have more closet space than me! Just to follow up on some of the earlier conversation about Lucy avoiding using the word "love" when speaking about Desi in interviews after the divorce, I found one exception from 1984. Here's an excerpt, in which she is actually pretty candid about him: Then the subject of Desi Arnaz was raised, Lucy grew immediately wistful and nostalgic. "What can I tell you, I loved him," she said, a tear beginning to form in her left eye. "He and I just had different hopes for what love and marriage ought to be. But, he's a great father to our kids…a good man." With that, Lucy began dabbing at her eyes. "I'll never stop loving Desi. And I know how much he'll always love me. He and I are good now. Growing older and maturing is the best thing that ever happened to us. And you know it's no secret that we had our problems, but I can look at Desi now and remember the fantastic times we had together back then, too." "That's all you're getting out of me!" her voice rising. "Can we change the subject please?" Full interview available here: http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/2758446/posts It sounds like Lucy was pre-gaming this interview with one of her slushies, so... in vino veritas! Seriously, though, I think this quote helps confirm why the marriage with Gary worked: she and Gary were apparently more on the same page about what love and marriage should be, while Lucy and Desi weren't. I also love this quote because it demonstrates that Lucy and Desi's relationship ended on a good note. There was a lot of bitterness at the begining of their life post-divorce, and so much sadness that Lucy couldn't watch Desi on a re-run of ILL for years. But to hear her say that she could now look at him and remember the good times instead of the terrible times is wonderful. And to hear that their relationship had grown and matured -- even though they were divorced -- was sweet. This comment -- made two years before Desi died -- tells me that in some small way, they had a happy ending. That said, it's interesting that talking about Desi could instantly bring Lucy to tears, as it did in Dr. Chirban's interview a few years earlier. In Dr. Chriban's interview transcript commentary, he stated that the breakup with Desi was "still quite a live drama for her." So while she felt that their relationship matured and maybe even forgave him, the pain was still there, even 20 and 25 years later. I guess they had a bittersweet happy ending. One final thought about the 1984 interview, and her reference to Viv as the love of her life: at least Desi and Gary didn't have to compete for that title!
  5. Gary letters

    Maybe Paula had her timeline wrong. There were a few things in her book that I noticed the fact checkers missed, like Lucie and Desi Jr’s ages (citing them way far apart) and being off by a decade on the year of one of Lucy’s films. Another interesting tidbit about Gary from Paula’s book: his need to have large closets, to the point where Lucy had to store some of her clothes in other closets in the house because his took up all the room. I ever imagined Gary to be the GQ fashionista type.
  6. Lucy's Miscarriages

    I’ve been curious about this, too, and did some digging and wanted to follow up on the comment made about the possible pregnancy of December ’49 that was referenced in the “Lucille” book by Kathleen Brady (which claims Lucy had three miscarriages). Brady claims that Lucy conceived in December 1949, six months after their second wedding, and lost the baby in Chatsworth, shortly after their appearance on “The Ed Wynn Show.” “The Lucy Book” says this show aired on the West Coast on December 24, 1949 and on the East Coast on January 7, 1950. So if she was pregnant, and if Brady was correct about the timing, it was a very short-lived pregnancy. Yet, Kathleen claims that radio listeners sent Lucy nearly 3,000 letters of encouragement following this miscarriage. So, if this is true, they must have talked about the pregnancy publically, short as it was. Brady then claims that Desi and Lucy found out they were pregnant while on tour (confirmed to Lucy and Desi on the radio by Winchell) but miscarried during a costume party upon their return to Chatsworth. This story was confirmed in Lucy’s autobiography, and the timeline she discussed pinpoints it to the spring of 1950. One theory that I have about the Dr. Chirban interview in which Lucy says, “I lost two, and I had two”: this could refer just to her 1949/1950 miscarriages because she follows up that comment with, “I was pretty BUSY there for five years.” If one of the two lost pregnancies she was referring to during this interview happened in the early 40s, it doesn’t seem to fit with her statement that she was busy with pregnancies for five years. So it’s possible she is referring in this interview to four pregnancies she experienced during 1949-1953. But if that's the case, this still doesn't explain why she would discount the 1942 baby in the Chirban interview, and the December 1949 baby in her autobiography. (Yet, as was also pointed out, Desi left at least one miscarriage out of his book.) The mystery continues.
  7. Gary letters

    So I just finished reading Paula Stewart's book and have some new thoughts about this. Apparently knocking Desi wasn't Gary's style. He probably knew that was a battle he wouldn't have won. Paula called his style "passive aggressive." She believed that Gary's remodeling the house in Palm Springs -- and especially taking out a fountain Desi had built -- was due to his jealousy of Desi. Paula also believed that Gary got rid of Lucy's longtime lawyer, Micky Rudin, because he was trying to get rid of the "Desi regime" and replace it with people who were loyal to him. It reminded me of what Carole Cook and Marcella Rabwin have both said about Gary trying to shoo all of her friends away from her in their first years of marriage because he didn't care for anyone who had been important to her during her years with Desi, and he wanted to be the dominant factor. A second thought about the Palm Springs remodel: I wonder if sentimental feelings toward what she had built with Desi was one of the reasons Lucy was so upset about the remodel? It would be in keeping with a comment that one Desilu exec once said about Lucy not letting anyone use Desi's office at the studio for years after he left the company, because of her "psychological connection" to him.
  8. Lucy and Gary's Love Letters in Closer

    Putting Lucy on the cover must really help Closer sell magazines, or they wouldn’t keep doing it. Very cool!
  9. Lucie and Desi Jr. Photos

    LOL - I did not even recognize big Desi until I saw your comment.
  10. Paula Stewart's book now available!

    I'm halfway through, with the first three chapters down. Here are a few initial thoughts: *Spoiler alert* -I love hearing about Lucy as a girlfriend, rather than a business associate or a backgammon buddy. We see the softer side of Lucy in this regard, which is refreshing. -Paula's encounter with Desi is indeed a disappointing one - definitely a #MeToo moment and probably the worst story I've heard about Desi. I truly believe that Desi was so drunk that he didn't know what he was doing. (Not that that is an appropriate excuse.) He once said he was on the road to being "morally and physically destroyed" and this is perfect example of that. It's good that he was able to pull himself together to some degree, especially after he gave up his share of Desilu and married Edie. But stories during this low point in his life definitely make you cringe. -The "kiss-and-tell' story about Gary also made me cringe. I thought Gary was better than that. -I've always wondered about the true nature of Lucy's relationship with Judy Garland -- especially since their kids would eventually date. Were they just casual acquaintances who saw each other around the studio commissary in the 40s, or actual friends? So it was cool to read about the luncheon with Judy. More later!
  11. Gary letters

    Regarding the hospital stay, I seem to recall Desi saying that Lucy was more concerned / worried than Edie was (rather than "better"), but I could be wrong. Interesting tidbit either way -- especially the fact that Lucy chartered a plane from Snowmass to come visit him in the hospital, if I recall correctly. I would definitely like to know more about Edie myself, and how much insight she had into the Lucy/Desi marriage. Marcella Rabwin (another Del Mar neighbor) once said that Lucy and Desi were so close to her and her husband Marc that they would fight openly in front of them. I doubt that was the case with Edie, but it would be interesting to know if she was just a neighbor that Lucy and Desi were friendly with or if they were close friends. (My guess is the former.) At the very least we know that Desi tried unsucessfully to hit on Edie in the early 40s, and Lucy and Edie used to play cards together. If Lucie ever writes a book, I would especially want to know more about Lucie's relationship with Edie since she has referred to Edie as her "best friend." I'd also like to know more about the tidbit that Edie considered leaving Desi over health issues -- I've heard that on message boards but haven't seen it in any interviews. Regarding the whole Lucy buying Desi out thing -- some accounts say that Desi made the first move to leave, while others say that Lucy made the first move and essentially forced him to leave, which he didn't fight. I wonder what the real story is. Either way, I'm sure both of them knew it wasn't working. I'm enjoying Paula's book and will share my thoughts so far over at the Paula book thread.
  12. Gary letters

    However, this begs the question: should Desi have taken more of a cue from Lucy in that regard? I believe it was Kaye Ballard who said that Edie was a very unhappy woman because she knew in her heart that Lucy was the first love of his life, and she was the second. Perhaps he would have done well to wear less of his heart on his sleeve, for his second wife’s sake. Edie seemed to be a class act. If what Robert Osborne said was true about Lucy coming to visit Desi at times when he was ill, and Edie would close the door and let them have their time together – how gracious of her. I’m in the middle of reading Paula Stewart’s book right now, and agree – Gary followed her to LA and he knew exactly what he was getting into. He may have had his motives for marrying Lucy, especially if he didn’t love her at first. She probably had her own motives. (Whether it was fair to Gary and to her kids to rush into a second marriage when she clearly was still in love with Desi is a whole other conversation.) I believe both of them went into it with their eyes wide open. I also think of the flip side of this as well – Desi’s perspective. What it must have felt like to have the ex-wife he was still in love with bring her new husband into the studio to work alongside them. Desi said that it took him a long time to accept the fact that he and Lucy were no longer married, and it had to be so painful for him. Not that he didn't make his own bed. But regardless, it's an incredibly sad love triangle. I'm sure Lucy felt really torn as well, which ultimately led to her buying Desi out. To Gary’s credit, he was very gracious as well. Desi wanted to hate him and had a volatile personality, but as far as we know Gary did nothing to stir the pot, and was even nice and complimentary to Desi. This reminds me of the interview Lucy sat for with Dr. Chirban (audio excerpt available here: http://www.drchirban.com/interviews.html). I’ve read a transcript that said she started to cry at this point in the interview. The doctor observes that he senses “care and love” when she talks about Desi, yet she won’t acknowledge the “love” part of it, saying only “care and understanding.” It’s fascinating to me that, even when asked directly about it, she avoids saying she feels love for him in ANY form. I think the love letters hidden in a drawer in her personal bathroom are perfectly representative of how she internalized her feelings for Desi after the divorce. She tried to hide the fact that she was still in love with him with friends, family and the public, yet in her most private moments – when she was all alone -- she found an outlet for her true feelings. Whether she and Desi ever found an outlet together is another question – and something, I’m sure, the public will never know.
  13. Gary letters

    My theory is that Lucy wrote the letters to reassure Gary of her love for him, to dispel any suspicions of her still holding a torch for Desi. Look at the circumstances - during her marriage to Gary, she was still very friendly with Desi to an unusual degree. (I mean, let’s face it, not everyone talks to their ex-husband on the phone several times a week - or by some accounts, every day.) Lucie has said that she couldn’t find a single person who knew both her parents who didn’t feel they continued to be in love with each other until the day they died. I remember one book quoting someone who worked on ‘Here’s Lucy’ who claimed that Desi would attend the tapings to support their kids, and when he’d visit backstage, it was clear that there was a tremendous pull between him and Lucy. Lucy tried to hide it by busying herself or going to her dressing room, but that electricity was there. So if friends and business associates saw a spark, don’t you think Gary saw it? Not to mention that Lucy and Desi were still very much a legendary couple in the public’s eyes and living on in reruns every day. I think his comment after Lucy’s passing - “at least she’s happy now, she’s with Desi” - says it all. I believe that Lucy went out of her way to mask her true feelings for Desi, especially around Gary. That’s why she came across so harshly in the Barbara Walters interview, and that’s why she was always so reluctant in interviews to say that she still felt some form of love for Desi, even when he would openly say it in interviews. She only said it towards the very end of Desi’s life. I suspect she didn’t want to give even a hint of her true feelings for Desi, mostly for Gary’s sake. Desi, on the other hand, didn’t seem to care.
  14. So much has been written about Lucy and Desi over the years. But if Lucie or Desi, Jr. wrote a book, it would undoubtedly offer a unique perspectives on that family. Aside from hearing more about the kids’ own personal journeys, what would you want to know about their parents that we don’t already know?
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