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Brock

The Newer, More Improved SOCK IT TO ME Thread

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Bobby: Oh, can you act?

Lucy: Can I act? Can I ACT?! WHAT ROOM IS MY HUSBAND IN?!

Bobby: Four-Twenty-Three!

Lucy: THANK YOU!!!... Ya see?!

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Miss Bankhead: My heart speaketh "Yea" in clarion tones that beat like an anvil inside my breast. My heart cries "Yea, Yea, Ye-- WHO WROTE THIS?! :angry:

His Wife: My husband! :wub:

Miss Bankhead: How divine! :D B)

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Just recently I ran into a friend... unfortunately, for her I was driving. We have been friends since... I have known her ever since we were the same age. I didn't even recognize her! That's how bad the job was. She walked up to me and said, "Hello, Phyllis!"  :lucyeww: She said, "I have found the most divine, new plastic surgeon!" I said, "I don't know how divine he is, but I'm sure he's new." She said, "I love him! He works so cheap." HAHA!!! I said, "I can tell you something else about him - he's left handed." We went to lunch. I couldn't eat. You should see this broad when she chews: nothing hits!  :lucyeww:  HAHA!!! But, deep down, she knows she's in trouble. She says, "Do you think this might hurt my career?" I couldn't think of one single career it wouldn't hurt. I said, "Well, what do you do?" She said, "I'm a lipstick model."  :lucyeww:

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Just recently I ran into a friend... unfortunately, for her I was driving. We have been friends since... I have known her ever since we were the same age. I didn't even recognize her! That's how bad the job was. She walked up to me and said, "Hello, Phyllis!"  :lucyeww: She said, "I have found the most divine, new plastic surgeon!" I said, "I don't know how divine he is, but I'm sure he's new." She said, "I love him! He works so cheap." HAHA!!! I said, "I can tell you something else about him - he's left handed." We went to lunch. I couldn't eat. You should see this broad when she chews: nothing hits!  :lucyeww:  HAHA!!! But, deep down, she knows she's in trouble. She says, "Do you think this might hurt my career?" I couldn't think of one single career it wouldn't hurt. I said, "Well, what do you do?" She said, "I'm a lipstick model."  :lucyeww:

What's this from???

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:desi1:I am the good prince Lancelot. I love to sing and dance a lot. I have an eye for a da-da-daa --

:lucy1: Wait. None of this "da-da-daa!" You have words, they're good words. Let's use them.

:desi1: Good words?! Lancelot?! Dance a lot?! Who wrote this?!

:lucy1: Who wrote it? Did you ever hear of Victor Herbert?!

:desi1: Yeah.

:lucy1: Well, all right then. Go ahead.

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:gale1: Lucille, is the camera all set?

:lucy2: All set.

:gale1: Now I'd like to ask you a question that could only apply to you.

:lucy2: What's that?

:gale1: Do you have any film in the camera?

:lucy2:<_<

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:lucy1: Remember that TV pilot film Ricky was going to make?

:viv1: Remember it? We've all been nice to him for days in hopes he'd use us it in.

:lucy1: Well, we can go back to being our normal, nasty selves. He already made it.

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Assistant: We now need a volunteer from our audience. Why, thank you madame! What is your birthday?

Lucy: August Sixth.

Assistant: August Sixth what?

Lucy: August Sixth period! :lucyshock:

Assistant: What year?

Lucy: He's the mind reader. Let him tell you!

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Fred: What was the name of that mind reader?

Ethel: Alexander the Great! What a mind reader. He could tell you anything about yourself.

Fred: Barney, whatever happened to him?

Barney: He's working for the Income Tax Department.

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Diana: Ricky, you haven't danced with me all evening!

Ricky: I've been dancing with my wife. :)

Diana: Well, what's the matter with Ralph and Freddie?

Ricky: They've been dancing with their wives too.

Diana: :marionstrong: What's this world coming to?!

Ricky: Yeah, well... <_<

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:lucy2: It just so happens that chatting helps bones to heal.

:gale1: Oh, this may be a major breakthrough in orthopedics, "chatting helps bones to heal."

:lucy2: And speaking of "heel!" That reminds me of toe, which reminds me of feet, which reminds me of dancing.

:gale1: Only you would talk about dancing to a man with a broken leg. 

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Mooney: Now, Colonel, does Mrs. Carmichael look like the sort of person who would hurt anyone?

Captain Sol: You should see what she did to Carol Channing.

Countess: I thought she was very good!

Lucy: So did I. :(

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Lucy: Where do you think you will go from here?

Carlos and Maria: :)

Lucy: ... I say, where do you think you'll go from here?

Carlos and Maria: :blink:

Carlos: ... We do not.

Lucy: Wee Donut? Sounds like someplace in Arkansas.

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:desi1: Is the phone for me?

:lucy1: Yes. It's one of my girlfriends and she's trying to help her daughter with her Spanish homework for school and she wanted to know if you could help.

:desi1: What does she want to know how to say?

:lucy1: "The check is good."

:desi1: "The check is good?" That's a funny thing for a kid to know how to say.

:lucy1: Well, it's probably one of those sentences they have to write out. You know, like, "Do you have an umbrella?" "Do you have a match?" "The check is good." 

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:lucy2::lucyshock: Harry, it's you! 

:gale2: How did you know?

:lucy2: Well, next time you play a woman shave off your mustache!

:gale2: I forgot all about that. I was having so much trouble with my pantyhose. 

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Katy: So help me from certain angles you look like that actress, Lucille Ball.

Liz: Oh, she's pretty! :D Do I look anything like her, Iris?

Iris: Nah. Lucille Ball never saw the day she looked as young as you do.

Liz: ... Well, thank you. I think.

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