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Tim Burton to direct Depp, Bonham-Carter in new "Lucy & Desi" movie.

 

Ball, Arnaz in "MGM" contract fallout; all Hollywood episodes to be edited with updated "Warner Bros." references / contracted stars

 

Ober called in for reshoots to play Jack Warner for revised "Don Juan is Shelved".

 

Desilu wavering on Vance spinoff deal; "Tell 'em not to dilly dally!" sings impatient actress.

 

Ball gives Andrews line readings on set, hospitalized for sugar-coated spoon extraction.

 

Lost outtakes reveal Frawley "wardrobe malfunction".

 

Method actress Card frustrates cast, crew by refusing to break character on "Lucy" set.

 

Hausner pitches "I Hate Ricky" spinoff.

 

Moore, Arnaz to host talk show: "Oh, Mother!"

 

Desperate "Lucy" sponsor stipulates that new character "Phillip Morris" be series regular next season.

 

1963 sees explosion of grandmothers running away with young salesmen, study finds.

 

Arden inexplicably fired for "sloppy diction"

 

Cole shoves Walley into orchestra pit during "Chorus Line" rehearsals; Walley replaced by Donna McKechnie 

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NATIONAL INQUIRER REVEALS DIRT ON BALL!!

 

Pregnancy story arc in season 2 of I Love Lucy was originally to involve the Mertzes and Mrs. Trumbull's secret plan to get Lucy's baby for their satanic cult. "Aunt Martha's Old Fashioned Salad Dressing" was to be called "Aunt Minnie's Old Fashioned Tannis Root Drink For Pregnant Women". CBS was about to go along with the idea but stopped when they were uncertain if audiences would be offended by the Lucy character's short blonde haircut from Vidal Sassoon.

 

Season four of The Lucy Show to remain in Danfield. The plot would still be reworked, however, to focus on Lucy and Viv's promiscuous liasons. The series would now be titled "The Dyke Sans Dick Show"

 

Hazel Pierce comes clean on drug abuse: "I was stoned during the musical number in Lucy Plays Cleopatra!"

 

Tapes with 184 episodes of "Bungle Abbey" found in vault. Reportedly, they were to air in syndication had the series been picked up.

 

CBS Confused as to how Ball was able to tape 184 sitcom episodes under their noses.

 

Gordon Confesses: Ball would use her key to sneak the cast onto the soundstage after-hours. "She was really convinced that they were going to pick up the show."

 

MPI to release complete series set of "Bungle Abbey", predicting it to be a hot seller. Still no word on Life With Lucy.

 

Final episode of "Life With Lucy" unearthed; would reveal that The Lucy Show, Here's Lucy, and Life With Lucy were all a dream that Lucy Ricardo had. The final scene would be in the Westport Connecticut bedroom and feature a cameo by Desi Arnaz.  Final line would be "You really should wear more sweaters."

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NATIONAL INQUIRER REVEALS DIRT ON BALL!!

 

Pregnancy story arc in season 2 of I Love Lucy was originally to involve the Mertzes and Mrs. Trumbull's secret plan to get Lucy's baby for their satanic cult. "Aunt Martha's Old Fashioned Salad Dressing" was to be called "Aunt Minnie's Old Fashioned Tannis Root Drink For Pregnant Women". CBS was about to go along with the idea but stopped when they were uncertain if audiences would be offended by the Lucy character's short blonde haircut from Vidal Sassoon.

 

Tapes with 184 episodes of "Bungle Abbey" found in vault. Reportedly, they were to air in syndication had the series been picked up.

 

Final episode of "Life With Lucy" unearthed; would reveal that The Lucy Show, Here's Lucy, and Life With Lucy were all a dream that Lucy Ricardo had. The final scene would be in the Westport Connecticut bedroom and feature a cameo by Desi Arnaz.  Final line would be "You really should wear more sweaters."

 

:marionstrong:  :marionstrong:  :marionstrong:

 

All were great but these ones killed me!

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Ethel the Cow was Vance in costume! Arnaz played rear half!

 

Ball snaps fingers in Carter's face during "Lucy Carter Meets Lucille Ball" rehearsal.

 

Perez widow extorts millions from CBS for other lost "Lucy" episodes under her bed.

 

Streisand to guest star on Lucy program, stipulates title change: "Here's Barbra".

 

Frawley's headache yowl becomes unlikely ringtone craze.

 

Ball buys new Patrick Dennis novel. "Someday I'll own all this!" she exclaims.

 

Conservationists crash "Shower" filming to boo Ball, Vance. Doohickeys fly!

 

Martin, Briggs team up for "Harry & Eddie's Laugh-In".

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  • 2 months later...

Fan buys unopened prop jar of "Aunt Martha's Old Fashioned Salad Dressing" on eBay, dies from Botulism.

 

Ruth Buzzi to produce "Lucy Lovelace" documentary.

 

"Lucy" co-star markets hostess pants under new clothing line: "Vance Pants"

 

McDevitt trains "Lucy" guest stars in self-defense before rehearsals.

 

GQ pays tribute to Frawley; has all models tuck ties into pants.

 

Ball reverts to Belmont moniker to hide from ABC sitcom fiasco.

 

Jenny Lewis signs for "good twin/evil twin" sitcom: "Daisy and Becky".

 

The Viewers Have Spoken: "Lucy & Ricky" number 2 favorite couple in new TV Guide poll. "Dharma & Greg" number 1!

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  • 3 months later...

Criterion Collection to release Best of Lucille Ball set. "Drafted", "Lucy's Safari" included.

 

Ethel Mertz bathrobe replica popular among women who wish to look older.

 

Jeff Chandler originated Fred Mertz on radio, lost recordings confirm.

 

MacMillan to be awarded "Most Dynamic Radio Actress of 1949"; Arden perplexed.

 

Tirelli engages Ballard in real life grape stomping battle on "Mothers-in-Law" set.

 

Welk wax figure melts, real one takes its place. Visitors unaware of swap.

 

Gordon, York to star in new series, "Purple Face".

 

Vance refuses record label's offer to record "Freddie My Love" cover.

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  • 1 month later...

Scandal at hair dressers! Lucille Ball accidentally asks for blow job!

 

Scientists discover cause of California earthquake: Lucille Ball turning in grave over colorization!

 

CBS promotes racial harmony - Fred and Ethel to be black in future colorized episodes.

 

Unaired Lucy episode discovered - "The Chimp Sitter." Featured appearance by Gloria Swanson.

 

Shock! Lucy does not want to be in Ricky's show when she discovers that she has her own!

 

Lucy disguises herself as Rabbi to infiltrate ham-eating Mertz household on Chanukah.

 

Conundrum! Ethel dyes hair to be passed off as Lucy's sister - Cannot choose between grey or color. Wants to appeal to a modern audience.

 

Ethel discovers porn under Fred's side of mattress - extracts revenge by leaving vibrator in refrigerator salami compartment.

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  • 1 month later...

FBI reports 78 Hazel Pierce sightings at 7-11s nationwide between 1968 and 1972

 

Lucy's stand-in found dazed in tool shed after four years on the lam; "I'm an angel!" she said, before being taken for psychiatric evaluation

 

Pierce given clean bill of mental health, new face ahead of Lucy & Jim Bailey

 

Pierce disappears again; also missing: Phyllis Diller wig, cigarette holder, squirrel dress

 

Reps deny Mary Wickes - Arnold Stang nuptuals

 

Sanders leaves Gabor, dumps Ball, shacks up with Nancy Walker

Can you explain the story behind the Hazel Pierce ones? I think I might be missing something here...

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Can you explain the story behind the Hazel Pierce ones? I think I might be missing something here...

 

After practically appearing in every third episode of ILL and TLS from 1951, Hazel last appears on TLS in 1967 before emerging looking markedly different on Here's Lucy in 1972, before disappearing forever... leading to speculation on what happened during Hazel's "lost years".

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After practically appearing in every third episode of ILL and TLS from 1951, Hazel last appears on TLS in 1967 before emerging looking markedly different on Here's Lucy in 1972, before disappearing forever... leading to speculation on what happened during Hazel's "lost years".

Ah, thanks! Never really thought about her disappearing before.

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Sothern late for dinner at Ball's house, devours mints and waxed fruit - "When I say 7:30, I mean 7:30!" says Ball

Television First! Frawley waits for entrance cue outside of camera range!

"Lucy" pilot postponed as Arnaz has bow extracted from rectum. Ball vows to work on aim during interim.

Welk lobotomized, gains personality

Ball serves as Matron of Honor at Card, Valentino nuptials; Bride sniggers at Arnaz during reception

Hope, Berle headline at Dinah Shore weekend, forget cups

Sothern considered for next Bond girl, "Eatie Gourmet"

Ball gives Berle full body henna rinse, uses up supplies

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Sothern late for dinner at Ball's house, devours mints and waxed fruit - "When I say 7:30, I mean 7:30!" says Ball

 

Television First! Frawley waits for entrance cue outside of camera range!

 

"Lucy" pilot postponed as Arnaz has bow extracted from rectum. Ball vows to work on aim during interim.

 

Welk lobotomized, gains personality

 

Ball serves as Matron of Honor at Card, Valentino nuptials; Bride sniggers at Arnaz during reception

 

Hope, Berle headline at Dinah Shore weekend, forget cups

 

Sothern considered for next Bond girl, "Eatie Gourmet"

 

Ball gives Berle full body henna rinse, uses up supplies

Eatie Gourmet!  :HALKING:  Brian!!! :peachonthebeach:

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  • 1 month later...

Television Archive uses Ouija board to contact Vance for posthumous interview: "Come in Vivian, over!"

Ball moves to NBC! Old network retaliates by producing new special: "CBS Rebukes Lucy: The Next 75 Years"

Shocking Discovery! Ball lost out on O'Hara role due to hair color matching character's first name!

Dolce, Gabanna market "Fred Mertz Jeans" to honor their idea of proper family man.

Vance, Sothern barred from appearing together to give others fighting chance at Craft Services table.

Moorhead first choice for Mrs. McGillicuddy; would've called Ricky "Ruckwood"

Autopsy shocker! Skelton's skeleton is actually red!

Freddy Got Fingered! Frawley tearfully confesses to inappropriate backstage behavior by Vance.

Arden, Ball to appear on "Show Swap": Tune in next week for "Our Miss Ball" and "I Enjoy Eve"!

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Love these in particular:  #1:  Backlash over "low riders" jeans?

Dolce, Gabanna market "Fred Mertz Jeans" to honor their idea of proper family man.

Autopsy shocker! Skelton's skeleton is actually red!

 

Desilu wavering on Vance spinoff deal; "Tell 'em not to dilly dally!" sings impatient actress.

 

Ball gives Andrews line readings on set, hospitalized for sugar-coated spoon extraction.

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Conidential devotes its entire issue to its scoop

 

"Fred Mertz Past as Drag Queen "Louise" Frawley Revealed"

 

with the supporting stories:

 

Young Fan Recognizes Voice from Rare Film Clip When "Louise" Says to Fellow "Flappers of 1927" Chorine: "Hazel, look!"

 

Short-Lived Marriage: Bogus.  William and Louise Were Same Person

     Sub-headline: "Family friend: "Come to think of it.  I never saw them in a room at the same time".

 

Flapper Confidante Barbara Pepper Finally Speaks

   Sub-headline: "Louise" Frawley and Pepper were the two finalists for the role of Doris Ziffel."

 

Dumped by Desilu, Frawley Plans Dinner Theater Tour of Pulitzer Prize Winning Play:  "I Am My Own Wife"

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