What if..

[Luvsbway]

If they fell out of love before the divorce it would haven been a lot easier to come to terms with getting a divorce, which if you read both their books was very hard for both of them to do.

[Annaleigh]

If they fell out of love before the divorce it would haven been a lot easier to come to terms with getting a divorce, which if you read both their books was very hard for both of them to do.

Amen to that! And if she had no feelings for him why would she say later on "I still don't understand why it didn't work out".

[Taylor]

Of course Lucy and Desi still loved each other after the divorce. They both even publicly said so and you can see it in their photos together post divorce.

[Luvsbway]

You don't share a kiss like this post divorce if you are not still in love.

 

[Luvsbway]

Even doing the last show without even speaking to each other, there is this last wonderful look between the two of them right before the last kiss.  

 

 

[Lucyilove]

You don't share a kiss like this post divorce if you are not still in love.

 

You do if you're an industry pro and you damn well there's a photographer around.  There are lots of buddy-buddy photos of Gary and Desi and we know THAT was not the case. And tons of such pictures with Vivian and Bill.

 

As I said before Lucy was very sentimental (she always kept everything) and  Lucy did not like failure, she couldn't handle failure that's why LIFE WITH LUCY hit her so hard.  Of course she regretted the divorce,  it made her feel like a failure as a woman,  but I think deep down she was glad that was all over. So no I don't believe for a minute she was pinning for Desi post 1960

[Lucyilove]

Of course Lucy and Desi still loved each other after the divorce. They both even publicly said so and you can see it in their photos together post divorce.

 

Now that's just silly.  Do you really believe Lucy and Desi would publicly declare bona fide passionate love for one another and be so disrespectful to their current spouses?   Of course they spoke fondly of each other and with respect (which I'm sure was legitimate) to the press, there was no such thing as a "nasty Hollywood divorce" in the censored press-release world of Hollywood 1960s (and even much of 1970s) Hollywood.  Stars did everything possible to avoid airing their dirty laundry back then.  But then things began to change in Hollywood and frankness was in and as we all know Lucy pretty much let him have it on that Barbara Walters special from 1977.  You don't call somebody you're still in love with a loser on national television.

[Taylor]

No, they didn't declare passionate love for each other (publicly), but Desi said in an interview around 1968 that he still loves Lucy and always will.  Lucy said similar things to friends about Desi.  It's not as if they were declaring how much they missed screwing the hell out of each other for Pete's sake.  

[Taylor]

Now that's just silly.  Do you really believe Lucy and Desi would publicly declare bona fide passionate love for one another and be so disrespectful to their current spouses?   Of course they spoke fondly of each other and with respect (which I'm sure was legitimate) to the press, there was no such thing as a "bad Hollywood divorce" in the censored press-release world of Hollywood 1960s (and even much of 1970s) Hollywood.  Stars did everything possible to avoid airing their dirty laundry back then.  But then things began to change in Hollywood and frankness was in and as we all know Lucy pretty much let him have it on that Barbara Walters special from 1977.  You don't call somebody a loser you're still in love with on national television.

And don't let Claude see that line about Baba Wawa and that infamous "loser" remark.  You're gonna get it now.  lol

[Luvsbway]

Oh boy, don't let Claude see that loser comment, it will be WW 5 on that topic around here.

[Irene Kampen Tripp]

What if her DRIVE demolished the marriage? What if a.woman having.the upper hand DROVR him to booze and broads?

[Lucyilove]

Oh boy, don't let Claude see that loser comment, it will be WW 5 on that topic around here.

 

Actually Claude is one of the most clear-eyed people at TLL when it comes to the Ball/Arnaz union and would imagine he agrees with most of what I have to say about it. He would be the last person to push a rosecolored view of it.  I'm  not coming from a Lucy-can-do-no-wrong mentality but I don't remotely see how nagging and a sharp tongue can be equal to serial adultery and nonstop boozing in destroying a marriage.

[Lucyilove]

What if her DRIVE demolished the marriage? What if a.woman having.the upper hand DROVR him to booze and broads?

 

Yeah that feminazi should have stayed barefoot, pregnant, submissive and in the kitchen! If his ego was too fragile to deal with a working woman maybe he should have married some nice little pushover in a lace trimmed collar who would be too stupid to realize what he was doing all those nights when he was working late.

 

And I don't get where you guys keep harping on HER drive?  What about HIS drive?  He was indifferent to Desilu's success?  He wasn't ambitious? When did she ever work without Desi in the 50s except for minor things? And as Lucy noted HE was always wanting to go to the golf courses, parties, gambling tables, yachts, etc in their off moments - with her or not -  rather than staying home relaxing with the family.

[desilufan2]

You do if you're an industry pro and you damn well there's a photographer around.  There are lots of buddy-buddy photos of Gary and Desi and we know THAT was not the case. And tons of such pictures with Vivian and Bill.

 

As I said before Lucy was very sentimental (she always kept everything) and  Lucy did not like failure, she couldn't handle failure that's why LIFE WITH LUCY hit her so hard.  Of course she regretted the divorce,  it made her feel like a failure as a woman,  but I think deep down she was glad that was all over. So no I don't believe for a minute she was pinning for Desi post 1960

 She didn't regret the divorce and I agree with you that it may have just been a great release from all the difficult drama. But I disagree with a lot of the rest of your comments. Its not always so simple as "If you love someone you don't do these to them." That's certainly the case, I feel, with Desi and his drinking. Its a disease first of all. And once your hooked into it  it can be very difficult to stop. Im not excusing him. Desi drank because he had a lot of inner demons( a difficult relationship with his mother, insecurities brought on by the business ect ect) This fueled a lot of anger and thus he drank to much. It wasn't just Lucy he hurt by his mistakes. He hurt his children. He hurt his second wife Edie. What then? Would you then say he didn't love his children?  I think Desi was full of love. But he was damaged

[Taylor]

 She didn't regret the divorce and I agree with you that it may have just been a great release from all the difficult drama. But I disagree with a lot of the rest of your comments. Its not always so simple as "If you love someone you don't do these to them." That's certainly the case, I feel, with Desi and his drinking. Its a disease first of all. And once your hooked into it  it can be very difficult to stop. Im not excusing him. Desi drank because he had a lot of inner demons( a difficult relationship with his mother, insecurities brought on by the business ect ect) This fueled a lot of anger and thus he drank to much. It wasn't just Lucy he hurt by his mistakes. He hurt his children. He hurt his second wife Edie. What then? Would you then say he didn't love his children?  I think Desi was full of love. But he was damaged

 

Exactly.  

[Annaleigh]

Now that's just silly. Do you really believe Lucy and Desi would publicly declare bona fide passionate love for one another and be so disrespectful to their current spouses? Of course they spoke fondly of each other and with respect (which I'm sure was legitimate) to the press, there was no such thing as a "nasty Hollywood divorce" in the censored press-release world of Hollywood 1960s (and even much of 1970s) Hollywood. Stars did everything possible to avoid airing their dirty laundry back then. But then things began to change in Hollywood and frankness was in and as we all know Lucy pretty much let him have it on that Barbara Walters special from 1977. You don't call somebody you're still in love with a loser on national television.

Also remember that in the same interview she basically said in different words of course that she still was distraught about it not working out. Also read what I posted about the post divorce since it was ignored.

 

Yes, she was humiliated, embarrassed, and sad she broke the world's heart. The best thing for herself, the family, and her mental health was to leave him. But that doesn't mean she didn't still love him. If they didn't love each other it would've ended way sooner. But they couldn't take being together anymore. That doesn't mean the love ever died. It just means they couldn't be together anymore.

 

Also remember what Gary said after she died. "At least they're together now." Also once again, the last time they spoke on what would have been their 46 anniversary, what did Lucy say over and over again? I love you.

 

Also take a look at Lucy and Desi: A Home Movie, where her friends and family say the same thing. People that knew them are not going to lie about the things they both said they felt.

[desilufan2]

Also remember that in the same interview she basically said in different words of course that she still was distraught about it not working out. Also read what I posted about the post divorce since it was ignored.

 

Yes, she was humiliated, embarrassed, and sad she broke the world's heart. The best thing for herself, the family, and her mental health was to leave him. But that doesn't mean she didn't still love him. If they didn't love each other it would've ended way sooner. But they couldn't take being together anymore. That doesn't mean the love ever died. It just means they couldn't be together anymore.

 

Also remember what Gary said after she died. "At least they're together now." Also once again, the last time they spoke on what would have been their 46 anniversary, what did Lucy say over and over again? I love you.

 

Also take a look at Lucy and Desi: A Home Movie, where her friends and family say the same thing. People that knew them are not going to lie about the things they both said they felt.

 

 Like you, I firmly believe Desi was the love of her life but I don't buy that "At least they are together" line. I don't think Gary would say something like that. Paula Stewart claimed Gary said this but I think Paula is full of it.

[Annaleigh]

Like you, I firmly believe Desi was the love of her life but I don't buy that "At least they are together" line. I don't think Gary would say something like that. Paula Stewart claimed Gary said this but I think Paula is full of it.

I believe it fully. He watched her grow into a great depression after the failure of LWL and then even more after Desi passed. Maybe Lucy had talks with Gary of how hurt she was because of his passing. Or it was just logical to see. Or he came to the realization after her death. We will never know. But with a friend like Paula, maybe he confided in her. So I'm going to trust what was said by an actual friend.

[desilufan2]

I believe it fully. He watched her grow into a great depression after the failure of LWL and then even more after Desi passed. Maybe Lucy had talks with Gary of how hurt she was because of his passing. Or it was just logical to see. Or he came to the realization after her death. We will never know. But with a friend like Paula, maybe he confided in her. So I'm going to trust what was said by an actual friend.

 Naw. I don't think so. Everything ive read and heard leads me to believe Lucy was walking on eggshells when the subject of Desi came up around Gary

[Luvsbway]

Frank in one of his interviews with Stu told a funny story. Lucy's at home probably playing backgammon. Gary calls to check in. Frank answers the phone near Lucy. Says to her," it's you husband". Lucy's answer, "which one?"

[desilufan2]

Frank in one of his interviews with Stu told a funny story. Lucy's at home probably playing backgammon. Gary calls to check in. Frank answers the phone near Lucy. Says to her," it's you husband". Lucy's answer, "which one?"

 Yeah I remember that interview! He also stated that in his opinion Lucy had great fondness and dependency for Gary but that she still loved Desi. This man knew her better than anyone outside of her family and has never exploited his relationship with her. I believe him.

[Annaleigh]

Exactly we have people that knew here, family and friends, that know the truth. I doubt they would make this stuff up.

[leenorman]

'Actually Claude is one of the most clear-eyed people at TLL when it comes to the Ball/Arnaz union':

 

Actually, I am going to dispute the above quote; since, NO ONE knew Lucille and Desi's relationship/union more than they did;

 

Then, just to save myself:   MOST OF US WOMEN - and probably, SOME MEN, understand BOTH sides of this perrennial argument about the Arnazes; MOST men, however, think life is just a bowl of cherries....

 

I better get out, before I get in......  Lovingly, JK

 

P.S.  I have THREE sons; One of whom, when calling me, says:  this is your son

 

my reply has ALWAYS been:  'WHICH ONE?"  (tee hee)

[C L A U D E]

And don't let Claude see that line about Baba Wawa and that infamous "loser" remark.  You're gonna get it now.  lol

Much too tired to fight that one again.

[C L A U D E]

Yeah that feminazi should have stayed barefoot, pregnant, submissive and in the kitchen! If his ego was too fragile to deal with a working woman maybe he should have married some nice little pushover in a lace trimmed collar who would be too stupid to realize what he was doing all those nights when he was working late.

 

And I don't get where you guys keep harping on HER drive?  What about HIS drive?  He was indifferent to Desilu's success?  He wasn't ambitious? When did she ever work without Desi in the 50s except for minor things? And as Lucy noted HE was always wanting to go to the golf courses, parties, gambling tables, yachts, etc in their off moments - with her or not -  rather than staying home relaxing with the family.

Thank you, there was no way I was going to tackle that one either!