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I Love Lucy - Season 10 Episode Guide


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For those of you who need a refresher, as it's been a while, here's what season 9 entailed:

http://www.lucylounge.com/index.php?/topic/1405-i-love-lucy-season-9-episode-guide/

 

10.01 - Ricky Redux

 

Although Don Juan was once again shelved, MGM did proceed with Ricky and Ava Gardner's new picture, entitled "Havana Nagila": a romantic comedy about a Cuban man who falls in love with a sweet Jewish girl who is on holiday in Cuba with her family. While the film is being edited, MGM decides to reissue Ricky's first motion picture in theaters in order to get the public talking about him again. Ricky tells the gang the good news, and says he looks forward to reminiscing about the film with them that evening when he gets back from the studio. The trouble is, neither Lucy nor the Mertzes can recall even the slightest detail about Ricky's first movie (LUCY: Did they wind up doing "Gone With the Cuban Wind" after all?), and must sneak into the MGM vault to view a print before Ricky catches on. Ethel blows their cover when she's caught smuggling two John Wayne film cans out of the vault in the back of her pants, though how anyone spotted them Fred will never know.

 

10.02 - The Test Screening

 

Before "Havana Nagila" is set to premiere, MGM plans to test it before a few audiences to see if the film needs any changes before release. Lucy and Ethel, desperate to see the film in its unaltered state, raid the trusty old costume trunk and revive Mrs. Worthington-Proudfoot and Mrs. Miriam Chumley, respectively. Fully decked out, they manage to get into a screening in Alhambra. Things start out okay, until Lucy and Ethel begin to notice certain lines of dialogue lifted verbatim from their forgotten epic, "A Tree Grows in Havana." Livid that Ricky used her material to pad out the film, Lucy marches right into Dore Schary's office and demands screen credit. When that doesn't work, she contacts the president of the WGA a few days later and explains the situation. Just when it looks like Lucy's going to land a guild card, MGM receives the screening results. Audiences loved the film, except for a peculiar subplot involving a tobacco picker concerned about his mother-in-law's liver, and all of Lucy's material winds up on the cutting room floor. WAAAAAH!

 

10.03 - Ricky's Hollywood Premiere

 

The big night has finally arrived, with a giant "Havana Nagila" poster emblazoned over Graumann's Chinese Theatre. The whole gang is dressed to the nines, and are accompanied by Eve and Brooks to the premiere. Everyone who's anyone is there, including Mrs. McGillicuddy, who tells her good friend, Hedda, how proud she is of Mickey the movie star. Just as everyone is making their way inside, Lucy happens to catch sight of a damp looking patch of cement among the many stone blocks in the courtyard. It turns out that Shirley Temple-Black had just placed her adult shoe prints right next to her childhood block right before the premiere. Being seized with a daring idea to secure her Hollywood immortality, Lucy deftly swipes Ethel's stole, wipes the block clean with it, then writes her own name with her cigarette holder and places her shoe prints. However, security shows up to fend off a new crop of photographers and Lucy must conceal what she is doing with her new dress. She has to stay put so long, unfortunately, that the cement fully hardens with her shoes stuck tight. Pity she didn't break them in first, as her feet have swollen and she can't get them off. She misses the entire film while stuck in hardened cement, the evening capped off when Ethel comes out looking for her stole and discovers her. 

 

ETHEL: Lucy, you've made your block, now STAND in it!

 

 

10.04 - Lucy in the Sky with Zirconias

 

Ricky, flushed with the success of "Havana Nagila", decides to loosen the purse strings and treat Lucy to a diamond necklace. Mrs. Ricardo is absolutely delighted, as she has rather tired of her years old anniversary pearls (Those old things!). Her delight turns to horror, however, when the insurance evaluation proves them to be false. Lucy then discovers Ricky bought them on the cheap from a back alley salesman and only claimed to have paid big bucks in order to impress her. The salesman even provided a certificate of authenticity, so Ricky thought he was in the clear. When Lucy points out that you don't spell certificate with an s, Ricky is cooked, and must take Lucy to the finest jewelry store in town so she can pick out exactly what she wants.

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10.05 - Our Miss Brooks West

 

Eve and Brooks have decided to renew their wedding vows and both Lucy and Ethel are vying to be Matron of Honor. Even though Eve hasn't officially invited the Ricardos and Mertzes to the ceremony, both women start an aggressive campaign of flattery, all the while discreetly smearing each other. Lucy spills the beans to Eve that it was Ethel who harassed her at the Brown Derby several years ago (LUCY: She thought you looked like Shelley Winters!) and that seems to knock Ethel down a few pegs in Eve's eyes. But Ethel counterattacks by telling Eve that Lucy didn't recognize her either, and Eve seems to cool off on both of them. In the end, both women settle for sitting in the audience while either Shelley Winters or Judy Holliday (they can't tell which from way in back) serves as Eve's Matron of Honor.

 

10.06 - Absence Makes Lucy Want to Stay Longer

 

With Ricky's picture in theatres and all Hollywood duties completed, it's time to head back east again. Except Lucy doesn't want to go. She seems positively ill at the thought of having to return east, even though Mrs. McGillicuddy and Little Ricky are anxious to see her back home. When everyone tries to find out what's wrong, Lucy reluctantly tells them that she was truly hoping to make it into a movie this time around, considering the headdress incident botched her first attempt. She flat out refuses to leave until she gets a part, any part, in a picture. When Ricky tells her it's out of the question, Lucy chains herself to the bed and tells everyone to go on without her. She makes such a ruckus that news crews and cameras make their way into the room, capturing Lucy's outburst of rage and sorrow for all to see. A certain director is so taken with the footage of the mad woman screaming on the bed, he incorporates it into an episode of his television program, and even comes to the Ricardo's house to ask Lucy's name so she can be given credit. Now with a part secured on "Alfred Hitchcock Presents", Mrs. Ricardo is happy to pack up and head home.

 

Special Guest Star: Alfred Hitchcock

 

 

10.07 - Planes, Trains and Delays

 

Since the band flew back to NYC right after the bus tour was over, there's no longer a bus to take them home. Lucy once again waffles on how best to travel, and ultimately decides the only fair thing to do is to go via all of the above. They're set to catch a flight to Topeka, then board a train to Virginia, then rent a car for the rest of the way. Lucy thinks this is a wonderful compromise but the others are furious they can't just go straight home. Sure enough, things get sticky right off the bat when their luggage doesn't arrive in Topeka with them, and Lucy put the train tickets in her suitcase. The gang must hitchhike the rest of the way home, but thankfully most passing motorists are only too happy to pick up "Ricky Ricardo, the big movie star!"

 

Enthusiastic Motorists: Milton Berle, Ruta Lee

Grumpy Motorists: Charles Lane, Kathleen Freeman

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  • 2 weeks later...

10.08 "The Ricardos Visit Castro's Cuba"

 

When Ricky learns Castro has nationalized his uncle's tobacco farm, he heads to Cuba to help, detouring to more Cuba-friendly Canada and flying to Havana from there. Lucy gets worried when she doesn't hear from Ricky, and sensing trouble, digs out her old 1936 voter registration I.D., just in case, and makes the trek down,disguising herself with the "Mustache" beard affixed with new and improved Bulldog Cement. Lucy arrives amid a pro-Castro rally and is mistaken for the Cuban leader, so she's whisked to the presidential palace. When the real thing spies Lucy hiding in his kitchenette, the two recreate the Marx Brothers mirror routine.

Meanwhile back in the states, the HUAC recognizes Lucy from newsreel footage of the rally (as does Ricky), and reopens its file on Mrs. Ricardo.

Castro: Phil Ober. HUAC head: Charles Lane. J. Edgar Hoover: Jody Gilbert.

 

Note: Castro himself agreed to appear but bowed out at the last minute.

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10.08 "The Ricardos Visit Castro's Cuba"

 

When Ricky learns Castro has nationalized his uncle's tobacco farm, he heads to Cuba to help, detouring to more Cuba-friendly Canada and flying to Havana from there. Lucy gets worried when she doesn't hear from Ricky, and sensing trouble, digs out her old 1936 voter registration I.D., just in case, and makes the trek down,disguising herself with the "Mustache" beard affixed with new and improved Bulldog Cement. Lucy arrives amid a pro-Castro rally and is mistaken for the Cuban leader, so she's whisked to the presidential palace. When the real thing spies Lucy hiding in his kitchenette, the two recreate the Marx Brothers mirror routine.

Meanwhile back in the states, the HUAC recognizes Lucy from newsreel footage of the rally (as does Ricky), and reopens its file on Mrs. Ricardo.

Castro: Phil Ober. HUAC head: Charles Lane. J. Edgar Hoover: Jody Gilbert.

 

Note: Castro himself agreed to appear but bowed out at the last minute.

LMAO! I love the myriad of references in this one. Jody Gilbert as J. Edgar Hoover is hysterical. Was the HUAC still in operation in 1961?

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10.09 - Lucy the Marquee Master

 

After the HUAC investigation is thrown out on a technicality (they had her files mixed up with another Lucille born in Jamestown, surname Ball...whoever she is), Lucy takes her mind off things by focusing on Ricky's picture, which has just opened in NYC. She is dismayed when Ava Gardner gets billed above Ricky on the marquee, and coerces Ethel into donning their workman's gear and switching the two names. Lucy regrets bringing her mother along to assist when she swaps the R for an M.

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Okay, time to get meta.

 

10.10 - The Lucy Lounge

 

Having saved up a sizeable chunk of her allowance for a change, thanks to the heady cash flow from the vineyards, chickens and Ricky's career, Lucy is eager to invest in something big. After discovering an abandoned building in Westport that is in surprisingly good condition, Lucy decides to purchase it outright (with a little assistance from her business tycoon mother). Now she has to figure out what to do with it. Shockingly, Ricky is not upset, and thinks Lucy and her mother made an excellent deal. He proposes that they acquire a liquor license, turn the building into a bar or club and sell their wine from the Munson's vineyards. Everyone loves the idea and gets right to work in transforming the building into a high class establishment, bringing a touch of New York City elegance to the people of Westport. A gala opening is planned, with Ricky and his orchestra preparing a full evening's worth of entertainment for the patrons. The only snag they hit is deciding what to name the place. Mrs. McGillicuddy wants to call it "Heady Hopper's" while Ricky is leaning towards "Bacardi's", after some relative of his. But since Lucy put the most money down, she has the final say, deciding to call it, "The Lucy Lounge". ;)

 

10.11 - Where Everybody Knows Lucy's Name

 

The lounge is a hit from day one, with patrons flocking in from as far away as New Rochelle. But after a few days, it becomes apparent that the Ricardos and the Mertzes do not have the resources to run the place by themselves, as all have too many duties as it is. Lucy and Ethel begin interviewing potential managers for the establishment, and narrow it down to two worthy candidates: a Mr. Weir (Gale Gordon) and Mr. Sheridan (Rhodes Reason). Both are so qualified and seem to know the business so well, the ladies decide to hire both of them to manage the place. The two gentlemen are happy to keep Diana Jordan on as head waitress (thus establishing Barbara Eden as a semi-regular) and also bring on the quick-witted Neil (William Windom) to serve as head bartender. A few townsfolk also establish themselves as regular patrons, including the jovial Joseph (Alan Hale, Jr.) and the acerbic Claude (Charles Lane), who primarily saves his good side for when Lucy comes by. It's only been a week, but Lucy knows she's in for an interesting time as owner of the lounge.

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Okay, time to get meta.

 

10.10 - The Lucy Lounge

 

Having saved up a sizeable chunk of her allowance for a change, thanks to the heady cash flow from the vineyards, chickens and Ricky's career, Lucy is eager to invest in something big. After discovering an abandoned building in Westport that is in surprisingly good condition, Lucy decides to purchase it outright (with a little assistance from her business tycoon mother). Now she has to figure out what to do with it. Shockingly, Ricky is not upset, and thinks Lucy and her mother made an excellent deal. He proposes that they acquire a liquor license, turn the building into a bar or club and sell their wine from the Munson's vineyards. Everyone loves the idea and gets right to work in transforming the building into a high class establishment, bringing a touch of New York City elegance to the people of Westport. A gala opening is planned, with Ricky and his orchestra preparing a full evening's worth of entertainment for the patrons. The only snag they hit is deciding what to name the place. Mrs. McGillicuddy wants to call it "Heady Hopper's" while Ricky is leaning towards "Bacardi's", after some relative of his. But since Lucy put the most money down, she has the final say, deciding to call it, "The Lucy Lounge". ;)

 

10.11 - Where Everybody Knows Lucy's Name

 

The lounge is a hit from day one, with patrons flocking in from as far away as New Rochelle. But after a few days, it becomes apparent that the Ricardos and the Mertzes do not have the resources to run the place by themselves, as all have too many duties as it is. Lucy and Ethel begin interviewing potential managers for the establishment, and narrow it down to two worthy candidates: a Mr. Weir (Gale Gordon) and Mr. Sheridan (Rhodes Reason). Both are so qualified and seem to know the business so well, the ladies decide to hire both of them to manage the place. The two gentlemen are happy to keep Diana Jordan on as head waitress (thus establishing Barbara Eden as a semi-regular) and also bring on the quick-witted Neil (William Windom) to serve as head bartender. A few townsfolk also establish themselves as regular patrons, including the jovial Joseph (Alan Hale, Jr.) and the acerbic Claude (Charles Lane), who primarily saves his good side for when Lucy comes by. It's only been a week, but Lucy knows she's in for an interesting time as owner of the lounge.

 

 

HILARIOUS! All of these.

 

Love the casting too!

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  • 2 months later...

10.12 - The Bouncer

 

After a group of Hell's Angels stops by the lounge while passing through town, the place gains a reputation as a biker bar and soon becomes the most raucous venue in Westport. The Ricardos are mortified, as are the managers, and an ad is put in the paper for a bouncer. In the meantime, the Ricardos and Mertzes agree to take turns filling in until someone permanent is hired. Lucy and Ethel drag out "Lucy the Lip" and "Babyface Ethel" again with modest success, but the managers put the kibosh on amateurs after an overtired Fred sends Mrs. Trumbull in his place. Fortunately, bartender Neil's tough-as-nails cousin, Iris "Hard-Head" Hogan, accepts the job and puts an end to all future hooligans taking over the place. Ethel, meanwhile, forces Fred to become a candy striper to look after Mrs. Trumbull while she's in intensive care.

 

Guest stars: Elizabeth Patterson and Iris Adrian

 

10.13 - Lucy Wants New Furniture...Again

 

Lucy has now lived with the same set of furniture for over three years, a new record for her. Truthfully, she was sick of it two years ago, but felt she should wait until they were more financially comfortable before broaching the subject with Ricky again. Given their heady cash flow, Ricky agrees, but only if she gets a respectable trade-in on their current items. Now Lucy's in a jam, as she's already ordered a whole new set and has promised her old items to Ethel free of charge. Desperate, she pleads with the Mertzes to pay a modest sum to appease Ricky. They are so insulted that they throw her out. What's more, when the new furniture is delivered the next day, the Mertzes take possession of it and decorate the guest house. There then follows a tense hostage trade off negotiation moderated by the Ramseys, which finally ends with all pieces of furniture traded back to their appropriate house and all hard feelings forgotten.

 

10.14 - Ethel's Dilemma

 

The gang becomes worried about Ethel when she complains about feeling dauncy, but they become positively terrified when she eventually misses a meal. Finally, Ethel confides to Lucy that her doctor says she's beginning "the change". Fred and Ricky, meanwhile, taking note of Ethel's temperament and fluctuating weight, believe her to be 'specting. Fred, not anxious to become a parent at this late stage, tries to bribe Hard-Head down at the lounge to give Ethel a bounce in the breadbasket and put an end to all this. A livid Hard-Head retaliates by bouncing Fred off the wall, putting him in traction alongside Mrs. Trumbull. Ethel, meanwhile, performs a solo recital of songs and Vagina Monologue readings on karaoke night.

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  • 7 months later...

10.15 - Another Séance

 

While on a shopping trip in New York, Lucy and Ethel encounter Ricky's old employer Mr. Merriweather in a used bookstore, avidly pursing books about the afterlife. Immediately recognizing Lucy and "Madame Mertzola," he begs them to help him. The news that his beloved Tilly was condemned to hell has haunted his dreams for the past 10 years and the poor man is a shadow of his former self. He also explains that his conversation with Adelaide brought back many repressed memories of the horrible treatment she subjected him to, causing him to form multiple personalities to escape her constant nagging inside his head. However, "Mr. Beecher" and "Mario" didn't fare much better, and the traumatic events they encountered (a murder and a long, scary bus ride to San Francisco, respectively) caused them to vanish and Mr. Merriweather to return, Adelaide and all. He is convinced the only thing that will ease his long-tormented mind is another séance, one where he can make peace with Adelaide and help guide Tilly out of the fiery depths and to the pearly gates. Though Lucy and Ethel have long since given up their obsession with the occult, they feel so guilty about their actions causing the man so much trouble that they agree to help, and invite him to the country that very evening. Ricky and Fred are less than thrilled at the idea, especially since the show Merriweather put Ricky in was a flop and did nothing to advance his career. Nonetheless, Mr. Merriweather arrives that evening to find the house lit only by candlelight, and Madame Mertzola at the ready with her crystal ball. Lucy, Ricky and Fred must act quickly, however, when Merriweather announces that he also wants to contact his departed mother, father, sister, cousin, aunt and uncle! Not only that, but he wants to SEE them as well as talk to them. Fortunately, the Ramseys and the Munsons aren't busy, so they become the other witnesses while Lucy, Ricky and Fred take turns with the Mother Carroll trunk, which luckily has just enough costumes to fit the bill. Fred the dog's untimely barking fortunately doesn't ruin the charade, as it occurs during the Tilly portion of the conversation. The other Fred's drag rendition of Adelaide is so convincing that Mr. Merriweather nearly faints, but in the end he gets the peace of mind he so long craved. And, to make the whole evening worth while, he announces that he wants the Ricardos and the Mertzes to be involved in the first project his fledgling film company is producing.

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10.16 - Little Stevie's Little Dividend

 

Lucy's rivalry with Carolyn Appleby flares up again when Carolyn tells Lucy she's expecting another child. Lucy's even more incensed when she learns Carolyn's 8 months along and that she was the last to be told. Lucy, not wanting to be outdone, proposes to Ricky the idea of expanding their family. Naturally, Ricky thinks she's Babalooney. Determined not to let Carolyn outshine her at the next meeting of their women's club, she shocks all the club members by showing up with a padded stomach and a bowl full of ice cream and sardines. Ethel thinks Lucy's brain has finally been henna poisoned but keeps her mouth shut, for once. But Lucy's really in for it when the girls show up at the lounge for a surprise baby shower a few days later and catch her halfway through her third glass of wine.

 

10.17 - Lucy the Godmother

 

Lucy tries to get back into Carolyn's good books by offering to be the new baby's godmother. Carolyn flatly refuses, saying she's already given the honor to Marion Strong. Lucy now devises a series of schemes to smear Marion's reputation and make her look bad in front of Carolyn. Of course, the only one who ends up looking foolish is Lucy, especially when she and Marion continue their squabbling at the hospital after Carolyn goes into labor (Charlie being out of town for the day). But once the healthy baby girl arrives, all is forgotten, and everybody kisses and makes up. Tensions heat up again, however, after Carolyn names Marion godmother but decides to name the baby after Lucy. Now Marion's jealous and the two start bickering all over again.

 

10.18 - Ricky and Fred Feel Left Out

 

Ricky and Fred are thrilled to learn that a new golf club is forming in Westport, but are dismayed to learn that it's only open to women. They're even more dismayed when Lucy and Ethel join it. The girls become good friends with the president, Diane, who even gets a kick out of their hilarious stories about the first time they tried to learn golf years before. But the boys don't think it's fair that they're excluded just for being men, and decide to take a leaf out of Lucy's book by disguising themselves. "Renita" and "Hazel" are of course accepted, and wow everyone with their game prowess. Lucy, Ethel and Diane aren't so easily fooled but go along with the gag just to humor them, but not without engaging in plenty of "girl talk" where everyone takes turns roasting their husbands.

 

Guest star: Dinah Shore

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  • 1 year later...

I know we haven't done any of these episode ideas for quite a while, but I was feeling creative today, so here are a few more for old times' sake.

 

10.19 - I Married Marion - Part One

 

After Marion Strong and her husband, Bill (guest star Gary Morton), make a generous contribution to Charlie Appleby's television company, Charlie casts them in a new TV show he's producing. Lucy and Ricky are incensed, as Charlie never did anything like that for them after all the support they've offered. Lucy's even more furious when she learns Charlie and Carolyn will be co-starring as Bill and Marion's neighbors. Grudgingly, the Ricardos and the Mertzes tune in to the premiere of I Married Marion, which consists of two episodes back-to-back that night.

 

The Strongs play Marion and Mickey Richardson. He is a modestly successful supper-club comedian, she is his wife. They are happily married and in love. The only bone of contention between them is her strong desire to break into comedy, and his equally strong desire to keep her out of it. Joining in the fun are their best friends and next-door neighbors, Ed and Roberta Hertz, two successful actors on the New York stage. In the debut episode, Marion and Roberta go on a healthy living kick and wind up getting sloshed on a high alcohol health tonic, Minevitametaveg. In the following outing, the girls wreak havoc at a salt water taffy plant while the boys try their hand at housework, flooding the kitchen with spaghetti in the process. Lucy, Ricky and Ethel stare on in horror, with only Fred guffawing like a buffoon. It's painfully obvious that Charlie has based the series on Lucy's wild antics, relayed to him second-hand by blabbermouth Carolyn. Livid, Lucy and Ricky drive into New York the next morning to pay the Applebys a visit, demanding an explanation. Carolyn is nonplussed, considering it fair retribution for Lucy's many "misdeeds" against her. Charlie, however, is thoroughly embarrassed at being caught red-handed, and immediately offers them and the Mertzes creative input, plus recurring roles in upcoming episodes. Everyone is delighted...except Carolyn.

 

10.20 - I Married Marion - Part Two

 

The Ricardos and the Mertzes are thrilled at the chance to appear on television, especially since the show has been doing reasonably well in the ratings. Ricky and Lucy are playing Carlos and Lillian Applebaum, friends of the Richardsons (Carlos was originally named Phillip, but sponsor Lucky Strike forbade usage of the name Phillip, lest anyone be reminded about one of their competitors). For this episode, the Applebaums accompany the Richardsons on a tour of Napa Valley. Unfortunately, what with one thing and another, there just wasn't room for Fred and Ethel to have regular roles, so they grudgingly accept the chance to appear as various minor characters in different episodes. Fred isn't too phased at having to play "Waiter No. 2", as less work gives him more time at home to watch baseball, but Ethel is grumpy that she gets saddled with "Fat Woman on Bus" (LUCY: "Well, that's the way the showbiz ball bounces!").

 

Rehearsals start out smoothly enough, but as the week progresses, tensions rise. Lucy is none-too-pleased with Marion's cackling interpretation of her, and begins dropping unsubtle hints that she and Ricky would be more suitable as the lead couple, given Ricky's name-value and her 'sperience.

 

LUCY: Ricky has starred in two Hollywood pictures, and I've had YEARS of experience myself. Who even knows who you and Bill are?

MARION: Well they mention us at the beginning of the program, you know!

 

Carolyn, meanwhile, knows full well that Lucy based Lillian Applebaum on her, and is seething at what a condescending, pretentious bore Lucy's portraying her as.

 

CAROLYN: Honestly, Lucy, I sound NOTHING like that! You're just doing this to insult me.

LUCY: Truth in comedy, Carolyn. Sure, there might be a slight exaggeration here and there...

 

Ricky, meanwhile, isn't too fond of Bill, and can't imagine why anyone would want to be married to a putz like him.

 

But things really go sour at dress rehearsal, when Lucy and Marion are stomping elderberries for the wine vat scene. Lucy, taking issue with Marion's comedic timing, snaps her fingers repeatedly in her face and begins re-directing the entire scene the way she remembers experiencing it. Mr. Kenwith, the director (Guest star Lou Krugman) throws up his hands and walks out, and before anyone can intervene, Lucy tackles Marion and down they go. Charlie and Ricky try to stop them, but wind up splattered with elderberries. Carolyn, Fred and Ethel get thrown into the mix, and soon every cast and crew member are soaked head-to-toe. Fortunately, the cameras were rolling at the time, giving Charlie an excellent addition to the blooper reel. Everyone feels incredibly foolish afterwards and agrees to move on for the sake of the show. Unfortunately, the numbers the next week reveal a new comedy starring Joan Davis, Here's Joan, premiered in the same timeslot and pummeled them in the ratings, leading Lucky Strike to pull the plug.

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I know we haven't done any of these episode ideas for quite a while, but I was feeling creative today, so here are a few more for old times' sake.

 

10.19 - I Married Marion - Part One

 

After Marion Strong and her husband, Bill (guest star Gary Morton), make a generous contribution to Charlie Appleby's television company, Charlie casts them in a new TV show he's producing. Lucy and Ricky are incensed, as Charlie never did anything like that for them after all the support they've offered. Lucy's even more furious when she learns Charlie and Carolyn will be co-starring as Bill and Marion's neighbors. Grudgingly, the Ricardos and the Mertzes tune in to the premiere of I Married Marion, which consists of two episodes back-to-back that night.

 

The Strongs play Marion and Mickey Richardson. He is a modestly successful supper-club comedian, she is his wife. They are happily married and in love. The only bone of contention between them is her strong desire to break into comedy, and his equally strong desire to keep her out of it. Joining in the fun are their best friends and next-door neighbors, Ed and Roberta Hertz, two successful actors on the New York stage. In the debut episode, Marion and Roberta go on a healthy living kick and wind up getting sloshed on a high alcohol health tonic, Minevitametaveg. In the following outing, the girls wreak havoc at a salt water taffy plant while the boys try their hand at housework, flooding the kitchen with spaghetti in the process. Lucy, Ricky and Ethel stare on in horror, with only Fred guffawing like a buffoon. It's painfully obvious that Charlie has based the series on Lucy's wild antics, relayed to him second-hand by blabbermouth Carolyn. Livid, Lucy and Ricky drive into New York the next morning to pay the Applebys a visit, demanding an explanation. Carolyn is nonplussed, considering it fair retribution for Lucy's many "misdeeds" against her. Charlie, however, is thoroughly embarrassed at being caught red-handed, and immediately offers them and the Mertzes creative input, plus recurring roles in upcoming episodes. Everyone is delighted...except Carolyn.

 

10.20 - I Married Marion - Part Two

 

The Ricardos and the Mertzes are thrilled at the chance to appear on television, especially since the show has been doing reasonably well in the ratings. Ricky and Lucy are playing Carlos and Lillian Applebaum, friends of the Richardsons (Carlos was originally named Phillip, but sponsor Lucky Strike forbade usage of the name Phillip, lest anyone be reminded about one of their competitors). For this episode, the Applebaums accompany the Richardsons on a tour of Napa Valley. Unfortunately, what with one thing and another, there just wasn't room for Fred and Ethel to have regular roles, so they grudgingly accept the chance to appear as various minor characters in different episodes. Fred isn't too phased at having to play "Waiter No. 2", as less work gives him more time at home to watch baseball, but Ethel is grumpy that she gets saddled with "Fat Woman on Bus" (LUCY: "Well, that's the way the showbiz ball bounces!").

 

Rehearsals start out smoothly enough, but as the week progresses, tensions rise. Lucy is none-too-pleased with Marion's cackling interpretation of her, and begins dropping unsubtle hints that she and Ricky would be more suitable as the lead couple, given Ricky's name-value and her 'sperience.

 

LUCY: Ricky has starred in two Hollywood pictures, and I've had YEARS of experience myself. Who even knows who you and Bill are?

MARION: Well they mention us at the beginning of the program, you know!

 

Carolyn, meanwhile, knows full well that Lucy based Lillian Applebaum on her, and is seething at what a condescending, pretentious bore Lucy's portraying her as.

 

CAROLYN: Honestly, Lucy, I sound NOTHING like that! You're just doing this to insult me.

LUCY: Truth in comedy, Carolyn. Sure, there might be a slight exaggeration here and there...

 

Ricky, meanwhile, isn't too fond of Bill, and can't imagine why anyone would want to be married to a putz like him.

 

But things really go sour at dress rehearsal, when Lucy and Marion are stomping elderberries for the wine vat scene. Lucy, taking issue with Marion's comedic timing, snaps her fingers repeatedly in her face and begins re-directing the entire scene the way she remembers experiencing it. Mr. Kenwith, the director (Guest star Lou Krugman) throws up his hands and walks out, and before anyone can intervene, Lucy tackles Marion and down they go. Charlie and Ricky try to stop them, but wind up splattered with elderberries. Carolyn, Fred and Ethel get thrown into the mix, and soon every cast and crew member are soaked head-to-toe. Fortunately, the cameras were rolling at the time, giving Charlie an excellent addition to the blooper reel. Everyone feels incredibly foolish afterwards and agrees to move on for the sake of the show. Unfortunately, the numbers the next week reveal a new comedy starring Joan Davis, Here's Joan, premiered in the same timeslot and pummeled them in the ratings, leading Lucky Strike to pull the plug.

This is classic Brian, Brian! Bravo! My favorite line (surprise, surprise) is:

"Ricky, meanwhile, isn't too fond of Bill, and can't imagine why anyone would want to be married to a putz like him." :HALKING:

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This is classic Brian, Brian! Bravo! My favorite line (surprise, surprise) is:

"Ricky, meanwhile, isn't too fond of Bill, and can't imagine why anyone would want to be married to a putz like him." :HALKING:

Thanks, Joey. That plot's been percolating for a while now, I only just got around to writing it. I'll see if any Christmas plots pop up :)

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10.21 - Lucy the Lounge Singer

 

With business at The Lucy Lounge beginning to drop off, the managers tell Lucy and Ricky that the books are in the red, and that unless business picks up significantly, they'll soon be out of business. Ricky thinks they should just close up shop, but Lucy is determined to see her investment succeed. Meeting with Messrs. Weir and Sheridan in secret, she opens up her big bazoo and promises that Ricky can deliver Marlene Dietrich this coming Friday to perform (Ricky and Marlene having grown quite "chummy" in California, as she had a minor role in his last movie). Naturally, she hadn't informed Ricky of this fact prior to making the promise, and, unsuprisingly, he doesn't take it well.

 

LUCY: Ricky, I'm not asking for much. All I want is for you to fly Marlene Dietrich out here over the weekend to sing a couple of songs!

 

With advertisements already distributed and every table pre-booked, Lucy has no choice but to deliver, and must raid the costume trunk and practice her deepest possible voice while instructing Fred and Ethel to keep the lights as dim as possible come showtime. But she and the audience get the thrill of a lifetime when Ricky surprises them with the REAL Marlene, who just happened to be in town on a layover en route back to Germany. The plan backfires slightly, however, when Marlene insists on playing the audience both sides of her latest record, consisting solely of applause culled from her last European tour.

 

Guest star: Marlene Dietrich

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