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Luvsbway

Gary letters

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Luvsbway    2,003

I really have no idea how to take this. Is this serious? She seems to make a joke at the end. Thoughts?

 

 

Dearest “Wonderful Guy”

 

I love you- and even though you are thinking of leaving me- I love you just the same- If – and when you ever feel like coming back to me- I’ll be waiting. In the meantime-have fun-and keep away from Doris Vidan.

 

Your wife of twenty-six wonderful years

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Caewi    19

When I first read it I thought it was serious but your right the ending sounds like a joke. Who is Doris Vidan? This wouldn't be around the time of disasterous redecoration would it? If she was serious I couldn't see her warning him to stay away from another women? desi, yes, Gary no!

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LittleRickyII    309

From what I have read they had separate bathrooms so I think it could be a good hiding spot. I really think those letters ended up there post remodel. Also if you’ve seen the pictures of the bathroom it looks fairly comfortable and spacious.

 

I was thinking the same thing; probably not your typical bathroom.  She may have even had a desk or a table in there.

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Luvsbway    2,003

“Why do I love thee?” Let me count the ways.

 

I ainit no Elizabeth Barrett Browning- but I know my happiness phase- It started when I met my Gary-And he asked “Will you be my girl?”

 

I hesitated only slightly – And I have since been in a swirl, -

 

Of conteuh (??) unmarred by rancor (??)-

 

Sensuality and equality, humor and light banter-

 

Understanding, unbelievable fun and games inconceivable.

 

These are Blessings- That I know-

 

I’m forgetting about the snow.

 

Ten Years have flown on wings

 

For Gary-My Gary-

 

My heart sings.

 

 

Your Wife 

Nov 19-1971

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Caewi    19

I was thinking the same thing; probably not your typical bathroom.  She may have even had a desk or a table in there.

I haven't seen any pictures so maybe that explains it. Lol just what would you do with a desk in there! I still feel like its odd that she couldn't keep them in her room or a book somewhere, she must have been very sensitive about Gary finding them. Does anyone get the impression from these letters that either Gary needed a lot of reassurance or Lucy was desperate to make him believe she really loved him? There's such a different tone from Desi, one of desperation to be with him and sometimes anger at him but these are so much about I really do love you Gary.

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Luvsbway    2,003

I really find it sad if she had to go through that whole marriage either trying to convince herself or him about if she was in love or trying to prove she was in love with him. But think about it. The one letter shows she knew about how he must have been feeling about that “having to prove” thing. In one of the books Lucy seemed to really know what people thought about him at the studio. Then every anniversary and every mother’s day flowers show up from Desi. Then over the years his declarations of love still loving pop up in articles. Gary knows they are still close. And he knows they talked all the time on the phone. So I don’t know if Lucy is trying to counteract all this with reassurance. But you could be right that she maybe at some time in the marriage was trying to convince herself too.

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Caewi    19

Put like that Lubsway I feel sorry for him :( I think you're right, I think she was trying to convince both him and herself that she was truly in love. That's the tone I take out of these letters. The letters to Desi were more powerfully honest as though she just had to share herself with him in that way. Plus she wasn't afraid to yell at him in the letters or say not such lovely things - a good sign of real honesty. Gwry must have gotten so sick of the flowers and calls.

 

I wonder why there are no letters from Gary to Lucy to be found?

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GeneaLady    13

I'm thinking maybe she moved them in there after Desi died? I doubt it was h permanent place. I see your point Lubsway but I'm still not sure it was a practical spot. Did she sit on the floor and read? So very uncomfortable... Maybe as GeneaLady suggested it was more about finding a spot Gary didn't go. Perhaps his wallet :D

That's so good for so many reasons.

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GeneaLady    13

From what I have read they had separate bathrooms so I think it could be a good hiding spot. I really think those letters ended up there post remodel. Also if you’ve seen the pictures of the bathroom it looks fairly comfortable and spacious. Also I believe it had carpet in. I would not place it above her to secretly lock herself in there to read them when she was having a particularly low point or just needed to see his words again. If you think about it, it’s the only room in the house a family member is not going to think it’s weird to lock yourself in for a long time.

I've had this visual since I read about this years ago. A soak in a hot bubble bath, lit candles, a glass of wine, reading the letters.

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GeneaLady    13

Sunday 5:15pm

 

Dearest darling Gary

I’m just sitting here thinking how much I love you-admire you-really appreciate all you have done and are doing-how well you have learned so much that makes it possible for us to do our work-which we both love and –need. Then we can know we have earned our vacation- and thank goodness you have your haven of rest and I have mine-almost-because really I always feel the lose of you when I’m away without you-but we do have that worked out satisfactory.

I do find it hard to even plan anything without you, though, even going up to Colorado-but I do love and need the air and change.

You are a real special “guy” Gary and “my guy”

 

Bless you-“You’re Missus. “

"Learning well" and "doing well"... sounds like something Lucy Ricardo would have told Little Ricky's dog Fred.

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GeneaLady    13

I really have no idea how to take this. Is this serious? She seems to make a joke at the end. Thoughts?

 

 

Dearest “Wonderful Guy”

 

I love you- and even though you are thinking of leaving me- I love you just the same- If – and when you ever feel like coming back to me- I’ll be waiting. In the meantime-have fun-and keep away from Doris Vidan.

 

Your wife of twenty-six wonderful years

As much as I want this to be true at some point, this would be the worst timing EVER!

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GeneaLady    13

When I first read it I thought it was serious but your right the ending sounds like a joke. Who is Doris Vidan? This wouldn't be around the time of disasterous redecoration would it? If she was serious I couldn't see her warning him to stay away from another women? desi, yes, Gary no!

She told him to stay away from women all the time, although she called it "golfing". Evidently those balls weren't the only thing he was hitting on the course. Feel free to make any joke you wish. I feel bad for Desi that she seemed to brush off Gary's cheating, but not Desi's.

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GeneaLady    13

Put like that Lubsway I feel sorry for him :( I think you're right, I think she was trying to convince both him and herself that she was truly in love. That's the tone I take out of these letters. The letters to Desi were more powerfully honest as though she just had to share herself with him in that way. Plus she wasn't afraid to yell at him in the letters or say not such lovely things - a good sign of real honesty. Gwry must have gotten so sick of the flowers and calls.

 

I wonder why there are no letters from Gary to Lucy to be found?

For them to be found he would have had to write them lol.

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Luvsbway    2,003

 

This is probably why we have no Gary letters.

 

 

 

I’d wish you’d write me a letter-I know it’s asking you to do something you really don’t give a damn about but I’d love it.

 

Your Wife

 

 

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GeneaLady    13

 

This is probably why we have no Gary letters.

 

 

 

I’d wish you’d write me a letter-I know it’s asking you to do something you really don’t give a damn about but I’d love it.

 

Your Wife

 

 

Poor Lucy! I hope Desi continued to write them after 1960 to make up for Bozo the Butt-head.

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Caewi    19

 

This is probably why we have no Gary letters.

I’d wish you’d write me a letter-I know it’s asking you to do something you really don’t give a damn about but I’d love it.

Your Wife

Well that explains it! Not a letter writer it would seem. He doesn't strike me as a very passionate person - content but not passionate. So perhaps he just wasn't moved to do it. That must have hurt Lucy though as she expressed love that way. Still there must have been something from Gary over the years. Anything you know would be fascinating Lubsway!

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Caewi    19

She told him to stay away from women all the time, although she called it "golfing". Evidently those balls weren't the only thing he was hitting on the course. Feel free to make any joke you wish. I feel bad for Desi that she seemed to brush off Gary's cheating, but not Desi's.

Ohhhh do tell! I haven't heard any real evidence before that Gary cheated. I posted on here a while ago about the book My Lucy Years written by Sharon someone who worked as a costumer on the Lucy show. She had a friend who was a pro situate I think who said that she slept with Gary around the time of one of her big movies, Yours Mine and ours maybe? She said that a Gary cached really strange around her when he realised she knew and that her friend was disgusted by him. Another friend who sent on a business trip with Gary said that Gary was too frightened to sleep with hookers because Lucy might find out and asked for a blow job instead. This is all the evidence we have that he ever cheated. I would be very interested to know if more existed????? I'm quite certain that if it does that Lucy didn't know. I can't imagined she would have put up with that from him.

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Luvsbway    2,003

He doesn't strike me as a very passionate person - content but not passionate. So perhaps he just wasn't moved to do it. That must have hurt Lucy though as she expressed love that way. 

 

In Lucie's 3 hour TV Academy interview she briefly talks about both marriages after her parents divorced.  She said she din't know if Lucy and Gary's marriage was passion filled.  She went on to say she hopes it was but that her and her mother didn't talk about hose kinds of things.

 

If Lucy wanted quiet and boring then she got it.  

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Luvsbway    2,003

Another friend who sent on a business trip with Gary said that Gary was too frightened to sleep with hookers because Lucy might find out and asked for a blow job instead. 

 

This story is told in the Howard Rayfield book.  It's the only time I ever heard about any potential indiscretions. 

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Luvsbway    2,003

Last of the letters I have.  More of a note.  A bitchy note.

 

Written on Gary’s stationary.

 

 

This is a disgrace and I know you know I mean it! I’m so glad I bought you all the jewelry cases and some of the watches al of your 5 mall drawers area damned disgrace!

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