desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Wonder if Lucy knew that Gary had ordered Stu to do that. I doubt it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I doubt it. Then I wonder what she would've done if she'd found out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Then I wonder what she would've done if she'd found out. Thats a good a question. There just seemed to be a lot of things Gary was doing that Lucy was oblivious about. Like cutting off some of her old friends and "stepping" on a lot of the people who worked for them. Stu has said that if she had been aware of how he treated some of the people who worked for them(and by some I think he means Wanda and maybe Frank) she would have been very very angry. He said this to Bernie Weitzman and Bernie said,"It always bothered me she never found out". Stu then said,"She was starting to catch on toward the end I think.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Thats a good a question. There just seemed to be a lot of things Gary was doing that Lucy was oblivious about. Like cutting off some of her old friends and "stepping" on a lot of the people who worked for them. Stu has said that if she had been aware of how he treated some of the people who worked for them(and by some I think he means Wanda and maybe Frank) she would have been very very angry. He said this to Bernie Weitzman and Bernie said,"It always bothered me she never found out". Stu then said,"She was starting to catch on toward the end I think.' Yeah, I heard somewhere else that she and Gary were having problems during the last 1 or 2 years of their marriage... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvsbway Posted June 4, 2013 Author Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I have heard this "problems" before but never saying what the problems were. So what types of things were the problems? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Yeah, I heard somewhere else that she and Gary were having problems during the last 1 or 2 years of their marriage... Did you read any of the letters Susie Morton sold a couple of years ago? Very telling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvsbway Posted June 4, 2013 Author Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I did save a bunch of them to my computer and reread them recently. There are 1 are 2 where she is talking about something, maybe personality wise and I can't figure out what she is referring to/ talking about. Almost like some sort of warning about herself? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I did save a bunch of them to my computer and reread them recently. There are 1 are 2 where she is talking about something, maybe personality wise and I can't figure out what she is referring to/ talking about. Almost like some sort of warning about herself? I almost felt guity reading some of them. I mean they were public but they never should have been public. Some of them were sweet and you could see how she depended on the stability she found in her marriage to Gary. But some of the letters from her last few years were sad and troubling. Did you read the one where she writes that she knows he wants to leave her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvsbway Posted June 4, 2013 Author Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 No I must have missed that one. What does she say in it? Why would he have wanted to leave her? He had it good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 No I must have missed that one. What does she say in it? Why would he have wanted to leave her? He had it good. Its been a year or two since I read it and I can't find it anymore. But basically shes lamenting how he is never in the house and that she knows he wants to leave her. Its very very sad. I mean its pretty obvious that I don't like Gary and have almost zero respect for him but she found comfort in him . He wasn't the love of her life but she found great comfort in him being there but toward the end he was absent alot of the time. At least thats how she saw it in this letter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyilove Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Lucie once told Stu nothing she did ever pleased her mother. She tried to please her but Lucy's response was often critical. BUT behind Lucie's back Lucy was always saying how proud she was of her daughter. It was one of those weird things were the parent is very proud but finds it very hard to say. And it hurt Lucie. Stu told Lucie that her mother loved her very much and was proud. He said some people are just like that. And since Lucy was never praised as a child and constantly looking for attention from her mother...not hard to see why it may have been hard for her. Anyway, I feel for both of them. That's absolutely ridiculous and Lucie appears to be stretching the truth there if she told him that. Lucie has said on many times - even in some of her rather negative interviews - that Lucy was always praising her, and always telling her she loved her. I believe she even made a statement somewhere that Lucy told her during the run of THEY'RE PLAYING OUR SONG in pride and amazement that "I could never do that" which is rather weird since Lucy of course starred in WILDCAT. And even if somehow Lucy did not praise her in private, Lucy in many interviews praised Lucie to the skies as if her daughter were Bette Davis, Meryl Streep, and Barbra Streisand rolled into one, comments that could have hardly escaped Lucie's notice. Frankly I'm a little tired of Mrs. Luckinbill's self-pity act. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucyilove Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I almost felt guity reading some of them. I mean they were public but they never should have been public. Some of them were sweet and you could see how she depended on the stability she found in her marriage to Gary. But some of the letters from her last few years were sad and troubling. Did you read the one where she writes that she knows he wants to leave her? That could easily just be a very vulnerable Lucy though at the end wanting to be reassured that Gary would never leave her and not be based on anything other than having been rejected by the public via LIFE WITH LUCY, obviously a less than perfect relationship with her daughter, old friends and Desi dying, etc. I think she was fishing for him to reply that he wasn't going anywhere even if everybody else abandoned her and I suspect he did just that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 That's absolutely ridiculous and Lucie appears to be stretching the truth there if she told him that. Lucie has said on many times - even in some of her rather negative interviews - that Lucy was always praising her, and always telling her she loved her. I believe she even made a statement somewhere that Lucy told her during the run of THEY'RE PLAYING OUR SONG in pride and amazement that "I could never do that" which is rather weird since Lucy of course starred in WILDCAT. And even if somehow Lucy did not praise her in private, Lucy in many interviews praised Lucie to the skies as if her daughter were Bette Davis, Meryl Streep, and Barbra Streisand rolled into one, comments that could have hardly escaped Lucie's notice. Frankly I'm a little tired of Mrs. Luckinbill's self-pity act. Look I don't know Lucie and don't have a dog in this fight but Stu actually seemed to be agreeing that Lucy would do that. He hinted that it was the same with Desi Jr but Desi just dosn't talk about it. Im not slamming Lucy as a mother. And Lucie has made a point in saying that Lucy didn't have an example to go by since her mothers upbringing was lacking to say the least. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 That could easily just be a very vulnerable Lucy though at the end wanting to be reassured that Gary would never leave her and not be based on anything other than having been rejected by the public via LIFE WITH LUCY, obviously a less than perfect relationship with her daughter, old friends and Desi dying, etc. I think she was fishing for him to reply that he wasn't going anywhere even if everybody else abandoned her and I suspect he did just that. You could be right. She was pretty insecure at heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annaleigh Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Its been a year or two since I read it and I can't find it anymore. But basically shes lamenting how he is never in the house and that she knows he wants to leave her. Its very very sad. I mean its pretty obvious that I don't like Gary and have almost zero respect for him but she found comfort in him . He wasn't the love of her life but she found great comfort in him being there but toward the end he was absent alot of the time. At least thats how she saw it in this letter. Could be insecurity and I'm sure they just had marriage problems after and during Desi's death. More than likely jealousy, watching Lucy's heart break, and seeing her become numb because Desi was gone. He probably felt he wasn't enough to keep her happy. I at least can see that happening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chedderchester Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I would like to see the texts she sent Gary. Never knew that, that they had supposed problems. Why the hell would he want to cut Desi out of the home movies? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I would like to see the texts she sent Gary. "RU golfing? OFC UR! ROTFL Gotta great offer on challenging role! Pls look at contract l8r. xoxo" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 I have heard this "problems" before but never saying what the problems were. So what types of things were the problems? Probably getting sick of each other basically. lol There was definitely some resentment there on Gary's part after Lucy died. He said a few crass things to others and even went over to Frank Sinatra's house to bitch and moan about her much to Sinatra's chagrin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 That's absolutely ridiculous and Lucie appears to be stretching the truth there if she told him that. Lucie has said on many times - even in some of her rather negative interviews - that Lucy was always praising her, and always telling her she loved her. I believe she even made a statement somewhere that Lucy told her during the run of THEY'RE PLAYING OUR SONG in pride and amazement that "I could never do that" which is rather weird since Lucy of course starred in WILDCAT. And even if somehow Lucy did not praise her in private, Lucy in many interviews praised Lucie to the skies as if her daughter were Bette Davis, Meryl Streep, and Barbra Streisand rolled into one, comments that could have hardly escaped Lucie's notice. Frankly I'm a little tired of Mrs. Luckinbill's self-pity act. If it's anything like my family, it was just understood that they loved you and supported you but it wasn't expressed much verbally or physically. However, Lucie herself said that her mom constantly told her she loved her and praised her so I don't understand why Lucie told Stu this. It just screams immaturity and pettiness to me. Oh well... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvsbway Posted June 4, 2013 Author Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Could be insecurity and I'm sure they just had marriage problems after and during Desi's death. More than likely jealousy, watching Lucy's heart break, and seeing her become numb because Desi was gone. He probably felt he wasn't enough to keep her happy. I at least can see that happening. The insecurity thing is interesting. I think Lucy had a lot of this which might steam from being a perfectionist. The Lucille book along with the TV movie Lucy latched on to this concept that whenever things were going good, something terrible would come along to derail it. Sort of a why can’t I be happy and not think about what is going to happen next to ruin all of it. It happens many times over her life. Granted that she lost a lot in 86’ and viewed the show cancellation and Desi death as that bad thing to take away all the good. Good at this time, feeling so overwhelmingly loved by the public as this was when she was getting honored and awarded all over the place. You bring up a possibility of jealously and I think it may have been growing in the 80’s because of all these retrospectives, awards, etc… that played heavily on the ILL years in tribute. To know that this woman had an ever growing career the 25 years you were married to her and you played a part in that, but to be repeatedly reminded that the golden years and most beloved thing career wise was the magic she made with the guy who came before you is a big thing. Even the fact that your wife made history with putting her real life pregnancy, something she wanted so much with the other guy, on the air and seeing those shows played over and over again in tributes can be a little hard to come to terms with. So how do you deal with this jealously? Maybe it was spending a lot of time on the golf course and distancing himself a bit from her. Thus in return she has insecurities that he is bored with her and wants to leave. She may have had guilt over her failing health as well. I do have to bring up something that I find really sweet. On the TV Hall of Fame inductions Lucie does that wonderful song and beautiful speech to her mother. They cut to Lucy and Gary sitting in the audience and Lucy is just a mess of tears, probably one of her most emotional non-acting times on camera, but Gary is crying too. He really did take those kids in and I think love them as his own. I’ve never heard any bad things said about him from the kids. The Merv Griffin show from the 70’s he says some really great things about them. I think that genuine emotion tells me that they really did have a good and supportive marriage. Now don’t get me wrong here, I do think the man was money obsessed, bordered on tacky and had no idea how to deal with the TV business. And maybe he did push some of her friends away and totally made bad career decisions for her but he made Lucy happy and that’s what makes me happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desilufan2 Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 The insecurity thing is interesting. I think Lucy had a lot of this which might steam from being a perfectionist. The Lucille book along with the TV movie Lucy latched on to this concept that whenever things were going good, something terrible would come along to derail it. Sort of a why can’t I be happy and not think about what is going to happen next to ruin all of it. It happens many times over her life. Granted that she lost a lot in 86’ and viewed the show cancellation and Desi death as that bad thing to take away all the good. Good at this time, feeling so overwhelmingly loved by the public as this was when she was getting honored and awarded all over the place. You bring up a possibility of jealously and I think it may have been growing in the 80’s because of all these retrospectives, awards, etc… that played heavily on the ILL years in tribute. To know that this woman had an ever growing career the 25 years you were married to her and you played a part in that, but to be repeatedly reminded that the golden years and most beloved thing career wise was the magic she made with the guy who came before you is a big thing. Even the fact that your wife made history with putting her real life pregnancy, something she wanted so much with the other guy, on the air and seeing those shows played over and over again in tributes can be a little hard to come to terms with. So how do you deal with this jealously? Maybe it was spending a lot of time on the golf course and distancing himself a bit from her. Thus in return she has insecurities that he is bored with her and wants to leave. She may have had guilt over her failing health as well. I do have to bring up something that I find really sweet. On the TV Hall of Fame inductions Lucie does that wonderful song and beautiful speech to her mother. They cut to Lucy and Gary sitting in the audience and Lucy is just a mess of tears, probably one of her most emotional non-acting times on camera, but Gary is crying too. He really did take those kids in and I think love them as his own. I’ve never heard any bad things said about him from the kids. The Merv Griffin show from the 70’s he says some really great things about them. I think that genuine emotion tells me that they really did have a good and supportive marriage. Now don’t get me wrong here, I do think the man was money obsessed, bordered on tacky and had no idea how to deal with the TV business. And maybe he did push some of her friends away and totally made bad career decisions for her but he made Lucy happy and that’s what makes me happy. Thats a lovely post but I do take issue with one thing... he had nothing to do with her career except do damage to it. As for the TV Hall of Fame induction clip.. it is a very nice moment. You could tell it meant a lot to Lucy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 The insecurity thing is interesting. I think Lucy had a lot of this which might steam from being a perfectionist. The Lucille book along with the TV movie Lucy latched on to this concept that whenever things were going good, something terrible would come along to derail it. Sort of a why can’t I be happy and not think about what is going to happen next to ruin all of it. It happens many times over her life. Granted that she lost a lot in 86’ and viewed the show cancellation and Desi death as that bad thing to take away all the good. Good at this time, feeling so overwhelmingly loved by the public as this was when she was getting honored and awarded all over the place. You bring up a possibility of jealously and I think it may have been growing in the 80’s because of all these retrospectives, awards, etc… that played heavily on the ILL years in tribute. To know that this woman had an ever growing career the 25 years you were married to her and you played a part in that, but to be repeatedly reminded that the golden years and most beloved thing career wise was the magic she made with the guy who came before you is a big thing. Even the fact that your wife made history with putting her real life pregnancy, something she wanted so much with the other guy, on the air and seeing those shows played over and over again in tributes can be a little hard to come to terms with. So how do you deal with this jealously? Maybe it was spending a lot of time on the golf course and distancing himself a bit from her. Thus in return she has insecurities that he is bored with her and wants to leave. She may have had guilt over her failing health as well. I do have to bring up something that I find really sweet. On the TV Hall of Fame inductions Lucie does that wonderful song and beautiful speech to her mother. They cut to Lucy and Gary sitting in the audience and Lucy is just a mess of tears, probably one of her most emotional non-acting times on camera, but Gary is crying too. He really did take those kids in and I think love them as his own. I’ve never heard any bad things said about him from the kids. The Merv Griffin show from the 70’s he says some really great things about them. I think that genuine emotion tells me that they really did have a good and supportive marriage. Now don’t get me wrong here, I do think the man was money obsessed, bordered on tacky and had no idea how to deal with the TV business. And maybe he did push some of her friends away and totally made bad career decisions for her but he made Lucy happy and that’s what makes me happy. Nah, Gary wasn't crying. He dabbed his fingers in the water glass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeySanJoaquin Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Nah, Gary wasn't crying. He dabbed his fingers in the water glass. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Lucie once told Stu nothing she did ever pleased her mother. She tried to please her but Lucy's response was often critical. BUT behind Lucie's back Lucy was always saying how proud she was of her daughter. It was one of those weird things were the parent is very proud but finds it very hard to say. And it hurt Lucie. Stu told Lucie that her mother loved her very much and was proud. He said some people are just like that. And since Lucy was never praised as a child and constantly looking for attention from her mother...not hard to see why it may have been hard for her. Anyway, I feel for both of them. Oh wow, what an insight on their much troubled relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted June 4, 2013 Report Share Posted June 4, 2013 Sut LOL. ok here it is. Stu was asked if he ever met Desi. And he said yes he did meet him once backstage at the Merv Griffith show( pretty sure it was Mervs). So prior to this encounter with Desi Gary had asked Stu to transfer their home videos. Im not a techy person so im not sure what Stu was doing with the videos but he said he was "transfering" them. And while he was doing this Gary said to him"Cut out my EX husband in law from the videos!" (Im sure THAT went over well with Lucie!) So now Stu is talking to Desi and Wanda had encouraged him to mention he worked for Lucy. So he tells Desi he transfered their home movies. Desi looks at him and says"Oh so you cut me out of the videos" And Stu says,"No sir that was Gary". Desi rolls his eyes and says,"Oh ya. Gary WHO!" I think Stu should write a book. I laughed out loud the very first time I heard Desi called him Barry Norton. I remember them playing golf at the same event and Desi had someone bring him a better car as he knew gary collected them and his had had a problem so he was not going to be seen by Barry Norton in a Volkswagen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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