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Joke "TV Guide" Summaries


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Inspired by Neil's recent posting of an incorrect summary for "LA at Last," it got me thinking of other times TV Guide or newspapers posted summaries that may have been partially correct but overall completely missed the point. Like that infamous one for The Wizard of Oz: "A young woman arrives in a foreign land to discover she has killed, then conspires with three strangers to kill again."

Let's come up with some joke summaries for Lucy episodes that intentionally miss the point along similar lines, or else get information blatantly misconstrued.

Lucy Does a TV Commercial: An intoxicated housewife breaks a television set, impersonates a single woman and singlehandedly ruins her husband's variety show.

Ethel's Birthday: A TradWife refuses to wear pants to the theatre.

Lucy Wants to Move to the Country: A group of urbanites escape to the countryside by impersonating a band of criminals.

Mr. & Mrs. TV Show: A vindictive housewife sabotages her husband's TV show by slandering an innocent sponsor.

Lucy Raises Tulips: A woman resorts to desperate and illicit measures to aid the wax tulip industry.

Lucy Gets Her Wires Crossed: An old woman breaks a vibrating lounge chair and causes the entire country to fear for her safety.

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Off to Florida: After a meddlesome child steals their train tickets, two New York women hitch a ride south with a suspected hatchet murderess, who fears they plan to kill her.

The Christmas Show: Four apartment dwellers are haunted by memories of the past and Santa Claus himself on Christmas Eve.

Lucy Learns to Drive: A woman's failed attempt to make a U-turn in the Holland Tunnel causes chaos in the greater NYC area, culminating in a two-car collision.

First Stop: A group of lost, starving travelers are gaslighted and abused by a creepy small-town businessman.

Ethel's Home Town: An egomaniacal has-been manipulates her former beau into writing libelous, flattering copy to promote herself and denigrate her competitors in the hopes of achieving a comeback.

L.A. at Last: A star-struck housewife causes an explosive pie fight at a chic Hollywood restaurant. Her subsequent lies to exonerate herself cause her nose to grow like Pinocchio's.

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Tennessee Ernie Visits: When a naive, aspiring musician from the country forces his way into the lives of an urban married couple, the wife attempts to scare him away through seduction.

Lucy Makes a Hit with John Ritter: An elderly woman injures and then kidnaps an actor, then forces her way into his upcoming stage production.

Lucy and Lawrence Welk: A woman attempts to gaslight her visiting friend by blinding her and impersonating a bandleader.

Lucy Thinks Ricky is Trying to Murder Her: A housewife becomes increasingly paranoid when she suspects that her husband is having numerous extramarital affairs and plans to murder her. After being drugged by her husband, she confronts him and a pack of trained dogs at a nightclub.

Lucy The Bean Queen: In an attempt to get new furniture, a woman and her friend successfully scam a series of supermarkets in the greater Los Angeles area before recklessly driving a forklift and nearly killing a legume magnate.

I'd do one on "Ma Parker", but any description of that episode would sound bonkers.

 

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Job Switching: Two couples inadvertently create a strong argument for maintaining traditional gender roles.

Lucy & Viv Put in a Shower: Two women who forget the washers get more of a wash than they expected!

Lucy Gets Locked in the Vault: A member of the 99% becomes entombed with an elitist miser.

Lucy Gets a Roommate: A dowdy, screeching librarian finds her true calling as an exotic dancer.

Lucy Gets Jack Benny's Account: In order to secure a reluctant but wealthy client, a desperate bank imprisons him in a trap-filled basement.

Lucy Meets the Burtons: A boss and secretary conspire to steal valuable jewels from an over-tanned Hollywood couple.

One Good Grandparent Deserves Another: After almost drowning her grandchildren in bubbles, a disgraced grandmother is banished to the attic.

Mother of the Bride: Two feuding sisters compete on "Cake Wars."

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On 2/19/2020 at 9:11 PM, Luvsbway said:

A want a whole DVD of Lucy characters competing on reality shows. 

-Fred would kill it on Pawn Stars with his World War 1 and Golden Gloves memorabilia. I could also see him being featured on Extreme Cheapskates.

-Lucy Carmichael would spray paint her couch on one of those awful HGTV shows, featuring a gag where Mr. Mooney gets hit on the rear end with a big piece of shiplap. 

-An episode of WifeSwap with Irma Mooney and Maris Crane.

-Uncle Harry competes on Drag Race (with guest judge Dan Dailey)

-Vivian Bagley breaks up her marriage on Divorce Court and finds new love as The Bachelorette.

-And I know we’d all love to see The Real Housewives of Danfield!

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16 hours ago, Freddie2 said:

-An episode of WifeSwap with Irma Mooney and Maris Crane.

All of these sound great, but I'd watch this one religiously! 

Niles: "My Maris is quite delicate. Her weight can't activate a whoopie cushion, but Irma popped it! Marta's very overwhelmed preparing actual meals for a change as well."

Mooney: "My Irma may be 7-feet tall and bald, but at least I always know it's her! I spent 45 minutes talking to Maris before realising she was a coat rack!"

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8 hours ago, Freddie2 said:

-Fred would kill it on Pawn Stars with his World War 1 and Golden Gloves memorabilia. I could also see him being featured on Extreme Cheapskates.

-Vivian Bagley breaks up her marriage on Divorce Court and finds new love as The Bachelorette.

 

These are my favorites.

American Pickers stops by the guest house in Westport. Fred is not letting anything go for cheap. 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

World's Greatest Grandma: A one-woman revival of Fiddler on the Roof fails to win any major awards.

Lucy is Enciente: A knocked up city woman musters up the courage to confront her baby daddy.

Lucy & the Loving Cup: A Manhattan trophy wife insults women in blue jeans and the Brooklyn police force.

The Fashion Show: An NYC man contemplates raising oranges and tomatoes in Pomona.

Lucy Thinks Ricky is Trying to Murder Her: A paranoid housewife fears she's losing her closeted husband to a man named Theodore.

Lucy Buys a Boat: A cowardly captain refuses to go down with the ship.

Chris's New Year's Eve Party: Weird teenagers insist on adults chaperoning what could've been a fun night of boozy experimentation.

Lucy & The Countess: Two broads get tanked at a wine tasting.

Lucy at Marineland: A woman escapes her boring children and grumpy New York roommate by joining a porpoise act on the west coast.

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The Fashion Show: An NYC man contemplates raising oranges and tomatoes in Pomona.

               They needed to do an entire B story on Fred out in the orange groves trying to figure out how he could swing this.

Lucy Thinks Ricky is Trying to Murder Her: A paranoid housewife fears she's losing her closeted husband to a man named Theodore.

            Oh, can be played for comedy or drama. This made me LOL. 

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5 hours ago, Luvsbway said:

 

The Fashion Show: An NYC man contemplates raising oranges and tomatoes in Pomona.

               They needed to do an entire B story on Fred out in the orange groves trying to figure out how he could swing this.

I completely agree. It's probably my favorite offscreen event in the whole series. The visual of Fred scoping out orange groves with a frustrated Ethel is just too funny. 

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This is an ACTUAL TV Guide I Love Lucy plot summary from December of 1958 when reruns still aired in prime time, Thursday at 7:30 (6:30 central time)

"Lucy decides that she too should have a part in Ricky's movie.  Ricky gets her a bit part, but Lucy, hearing that only her feel will be visible,  hatches a plan."

Re: Fred, the orange rancher.  It's a great little touch, especially naive New Yorker Fred thinking the whole farming business is easy "The oranges know what to do."  Not unlike the plot of WC Field's great 1934  movie "It's a Gift", the title by the way having absolutely nothing to do with the plot that unfolds. As his strumpet of a wife, Kathleen Howard steals the movie away from WC.  Howard was a more strident version of Barbara Morrison. 

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1 hour ago, Neil said:

This is an ACTUAL TV Guide I Love Lucy plot summary from December of 1958 when reruns still aired in prime time, Thursday at 7:30 (6:30 central time)

"Lucy decides that she too should have a part in Ricky's movie.  Ricky gets her a bit part, but Lucy, hearing that only her feel will be visible,  hatches a plan."

That right there is exactly why I created this thread. So many real ones are so far off the mark, so why not come up with a few of our own?

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  • 2 years later...

It’s been over two years and few seem to visit this site anymore, but what the hell…

Fan Magazine Interview: A jilted housewife confronts her husband’s elderly mistress.

Lucy’s Italian Movie: A white woman appropriates a foreign culture by soaking up local color.

Return Home from Europe: A woman’s baby is dismembered and stuffed into multiple musical instruments.

Redecorating the Mertz’s Apartment: Two mooching landlords scheme to milk free renovations from their tenants.

The Fashion Show: A sunburnt dilettante infiltrates the A-List by donning tweed.

The Seance: A group of occultists attempt to free a dog from Satan’s clutches.

California, Here We Come: A meddlesome mother-in-law puts a man’s movie career in jeopardy.

Nursery School: A child’s health is put at risk by exposure to others.

In Palm Springs: Two unsatisfied housewives contemplate an affair with a closeted movie star.

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21 hours ago, RodMcK1 said:

Lucy, the Shopping Expert:  A satiric illustration of the pitfalls of rampant consumerism.

The Freezer: Scatter-brained housewife suffers hypothermia for cheaper beef.

Lucy and the Pool Hustler: Conservative banker falls for trans-female pool shark.

These are great! I especially loved Shopping Expert.

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On 8/6/2022 at 3:00 AM, Mot Morenzi said:

These are great! I especially loved Shopping Expert.

Hey, Brian!! Been trying to touchbase with you and see how your doing, if you're still Down Under, etc.etc....I started via Facebook but looks like you "unfriended" me, so...tried looking you up but couldn't find you so... would love to hear from/catch up with you if you are so inclined... send my a friend request please my FB is https://www.facebook.com/joseph.alamo.7/ .... Thanks!! :HALKING:

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  • 4 months later...

The Pilot: A pregnant clown nearly stabs a bandleader’s buttocks.

The Business Manager: A city man suspects his wife of insider trading, when she’s actually running a grocery store in a residential zone.

The Fur Coat: When a man forgets his wife’s anniversary, she steals a piece of his company’s property in retaliation. He then conspires to steal it back, only for her to destroy it.

The Kleptomaniac: The constant noise of a cuckoo clock drives a pent-up housewife to steal an elephant.

Lucy Tells the Truth: A woman’s lies and brutal frankness come back to bite her when she’s pelted with knives.

The Publicity Agent: A Middle Eastern conflict becomes international when New York and Cuba get drawn into the fray. 

Lucy Gets in Pictures: After getting her friend’s name wrong on a postcard, a woman is shot while descending a staircase.

Staten Island Ferry: A man and a woman, both married to other people, spend a day sleeping together in public. 

 

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