Neil Posted March 29, 2011 Report Share Posted March 29, 2011 I was thinking about what a slow walk in the park "The Ghost and Mrs. Muir" scripts were for Hope Lange. Nothing challenging, because they weren't reaching for big laughs, yet she won 2 Emmys, while Lucy had to work like a dog to make a dog of a script work! Not always successfully, but even the good scripts required a lot out of her. The Lucy type of comedy is hilarious when it works, but when it fails, it really fails bad. Safer to go with a 'smile-com' like "Ghost" But suppose other actress had been required to do Lucy material. Imagine: "Maude, The Stunt Woman" When Maude needs money for a leopard coat, Vivian gets her a job as stuntman Ironman Findley, requiring Maude to wear flats and speak in a higher pitch to fit in. This one actually has hilarious possibilities! And how about: "Julia and George Burns" George wants to revive his vaudeville minstrel act, but is running out of cork and finds a perfect partner candidate in Julia (Diahann Caroll) "Won't You Calm Down, Ted Baxter?" When Ted hires Phyllis as his assistant, Lou impersonates Georgette to get rid of her. "Hazel Runs the Rapids" or as it is otherwise known "Shirley Booth on a Barge" Of course turnabout is fair play. We have to imagine Here's Lucy bowing to the times and doing racier material: "The Carters and the Swingers" "Lucy and Harry's Prostate" Brock, is the muse calling? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 30, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Tonight on "Rhoda": "Someone's on the Ski Lift with Ida" Rhoda takes her mother to a ski resort where she meets her idol Hamilton Camp. Family Affair: "Buffy's Substitute Nanny" Mr. French decides to forgo his Lake Arrowhead vacation to keep an eye on his replacement, but his "Juan Jose" rug shampoo-er disguise leaves a lot to me desired. Muse to Brock...Muse to Brock, come in please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 "Julia and George Burns" George wants to revive his vaudeville minstrel act, but is running out of cork and finds a perfect partner candidate in Julia (Diahann Caroll) LOL! "Hazel Runs the Rapids" or as it is otherwise known "Shirley Booth on a Barge" :marionstrong: It's late, but here's the best I can come up with right now: "Shad in the Jungle" -- Prehistoric Imogene Coca goes on a hunt for a Gorboona "The Not-So-Popular Mechanic" -- Jack Albertson turns Freddie Prinz over to Immigration Services "Maude's Working Daughter" -- Maude is dismayed when Arthur finds Carol on the street putting her best assets to use. "Jonathan Moves Out" -- Angela Bower drives her son out of the house after thinking he was out all night with a writer. With a BEARD, yet! "Dirty Bertie" -- Mrs. Naugatuck finds her husband in a den of iniquity. "Buddy is Really in a Pickle" -- Buddy and Pickles Sorrell go on a second honeymoon. "Jerry Finally Cuts You-Know-Who's Apron Strings" -- Robert Urich begins to wonder what he did to deserve being cast on Emeril Lagasse's sitcom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoeySanJoaquin Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 "Hazel Runs the Rapids" or as it is otherwise known "Shirley Booth on a Barge" That's an INSTANT CLASSIC!! And gawd, what a visual! (And I LOVE Shirley Booth!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 30, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Brock wrote:"Buddy is Really in a Pickle" -- Buddy and Pickles Sorrell go on a second honeymoon. PERFECTION!!!....("...they yummiest he ever ate...") "The Ghost, Mrs. Muir and Flip Go Legit" when they put on their version of 'Gone with the Wind'. Hope and Captain are Scarlett and Rhett; Reta Shaw is a very pregnant Melanie, while Flip and Charles Nelson Reilly vie for the role of Prissy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HarryCarter Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Tonight on "Rhoda": "Someone's on the Ski Life with Ida" Rhoda takes her mother to a ski resort where she meets her idol Hamilton Camp. I've been laughing at this one for about an hour now. You two are absolutely hilarious! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Reta Shaw is a very pregnant Melanie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 I've been laughing at this one for about an hour now. You two are absolutely hilarious! Y E S T H E Y A R E !! I certainly can't compete with THEM but i would have killed to see Lucy do the All in the Family episode EDITH GETS MENAPAUSE. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Blanche & Her All-Nun Band -- Blanche Deveraux is put in charge of coordinating Pope John Paul II's visit to her museum to see religious works. When she senses the pontiff undressing her with his eyes, she decides the only way to get close enough to see under his cassock is to take the veil. Valerie & The Great Airport Chase -- Valerie Hogan (Valerie Harper) takes matters into her own hands when her pilot husband inexplicably tells her three sons that she's dead and immediately replaces her with his sister. Gene & The Great Blank Scandal -- In a special edition of 60 Minutes, Mark Goodson and Bill Todman face a class action lawsuit brought against them by several Doras who are actually quite bright. Rerun, The Sky Diver -- A "very special episode" of What's Happening!! Buddy Rogers Comes to Tea -- In the season six premiere of December Bride, Buddy Rogers throws Mary Pickford over for the vivacious Lily Ruskin. Mayhem ensues when word gets to Hilda, founding member of The Coquettes, the International Mary Pickford Fan League. Melanie's Replacement -- Melanie (Valerie Bertinelli) is written off Hot In Cleveland and replaced by a laptop computer with the likeness of Juliette Mills. Urkel's Punctured Romance -- Steve Urkel is devastated when his new "girlfriend" deflates right before his eyes. Kim & Her Prince Charming -- With his wife once again on her deathbed, Frederick Prinz von Anhalt comes a courtin', in this special episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Nipsey Through The Tulips -- The cast of Barefoot In The Park go on a Dutch getaway Charlie Sheen is the Life of the Party -- Mary Richards throws another disastrous dinner soiree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Everybody Loves Raymond, Debra goes to Ray's job to tell him she's SPECTIN, after telling Marie at home of course, MARIE, THIS WAS PRACTICALLY YOUR IDEA! But in the following week's episode, the baby is BORN and looks just like Ray's brother, this is what you call UPDATING an old plot. Six weeks after that, the baby is three years old and his first full phrase is I WANNA BE IN THE SHOW! That show's a two parter, in the second ep, Frank chuckles so hard he gets a heart attack, it's called FRANK BITES THE DUST! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 30, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Everybody Loves Raymond, Debra goes to Ray's job to tell him she's SPECTIN, after telling Marie at home of course, MARIE, THIS WAS PRACTICALLY YOUR IDEA! But in the following week's episode, the baby is BORN and looks just like Ray's brother, this is what you call UPDATING an old plot. Six weeks after that, the baby is three years old and his first full phrase is I WANNA BE IN THE SHOW! That show's a two parter, in the second ep, Frank chuckles so hard he gets a heart attack, it's called FRANK BITES THE DUST! This is just TOo TOO..... "Maude Gets Caught in a Draft", passes the physical and is immediately promoted to top Sergeant. "Rosanne and the Countess Lose Weight" but their 'roly-poly's rattle foundations as far away as East Orange, New Jersey. "Mary Locks Mr. Grant in the Film Vault" however this being the racy 70s they play the strip version of "Who's in the Barnyard?". The vault opens with Lou in his boxers so Sue Ann rushes in and closes the door behind them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 30, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Buddy Rogers Comes to Tea -- In the season six premiere of December Bride, Buddy Rogers throws Mary Pickford over for the vivacious Lily Ruskin. Mayhem ensues when word gets to Hilda, founding member of The Coquettes, the International Mary Pickford Fan League. Melanie's Replacement -- Melanie (Valerie Bertinelli) is written off Hot In Cleveland and replaced by a laptop computer with the likeness of Juliette Mills. Urkel's Punctured Romance -- Steve Urkel is devastated when his new "girlfriend" deflates right before his eyes. Nipsey Through The Tulips -- The cast of Barefoot In The Park go on a Dutch getaway Charlie Sheen is the Life of the Party -- Mary Richards throws another disastrous dinner soiree. These are my favorites and I'm sure if I knew ANYTHING about the Kardashians, I'd be in on the joke! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 These are my favorites and I'm sure if I knew ANYTHING about the Kardashians, I'd be in on the joke! Actually, as funny as yours and Brock's are, it would be so much easier for you two to take the easy way out, every episode of Laverne and Shirley, Absolutely Fabulous and even Kate and Allie are perfectly tailored for any Lucy and Viv involvement, LOL! ALSO, i wish you'd insert Lucy Carmichael in LOST, as she was LOST most of her life anyway and she would have been great as Mama Soprano, no make up needed if done in her later years. OR, Lucy as the bartender on any Cheers episode, of course she gets drunk as she samples the drinks she makes to see if she got them right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 These are my favorites and I'm sure if I knew ANYTHING about the Kardashians, I'd be in on the joke! I don't know anything about them either. I just picked another publicity whore that Prince Zsa Zsa would go after at random and it was them! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 30, 2011 Report Share Posted March 30, 2011 Eve & Kaye Take Up Biology -- Eve and Kaye decide to take a night course at the newly rebuilt Madison High School so they can help little Joey and little Hildy with their homework when the time comes. As soon as they enter the school lab, they are swept off their feet by the bashful biology teacher and Mr. Boynton himself is puzzled as to why Mrs. Hubbard bears such a strong resemblance to his wife Constance. Gale Gordon also guest stars. Ross Digs Up A Date -- Ross Gellar makes a very interesting discovery at an excavation site. Lisa Buys A Sheep -- Mr. Haney sells Lisa Douglas a new, innovative breed of sheep for Green Acres. Oliver is dismayed to find they are rats with a thyroid condition. Lisa and Mrs. Ziffel Become Tycoons -- Lisa Douglas has an unexpected windfall when she discovers her hots cake is a cure for the thyroid problem. Maude and Viv Learn Judo -- Still reeling from Hubie Binder's obscene phone calls, Maude and Vivian take a self defense course. Felix & The Military Academy -- Felix Unger is appalled by the conditions when he visits his son Leonard at his new military school. Florence Henderson Plays Florence Nightingale -- Carol Brady nurses Alice back to health after Sam has an unfortunate meat cleaver incident. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Eve & Kaye Take Up Biology -- Eve and Kaye decide to take a night course at the newly rebuilt Madison High School so they can help little Joey and little Hildy with their homework when the time comes. As soon as they enter the school lab, they are swept off their feet by the bashful biology teacher and Mr. Boynton himself is puzzled as to why Mrs. Hubbard bears such a strong resemblance to his wife Constance. Gale Gordon also guest stars. Ross Digs Up A Date -- Ross Gellar makes a very interesting discovery at an excavation site. Lisa Buys A Sheep -- Mr. Haney sells Lisa Douglas a new, innovative breed of sheep for Green Acres. Oliver is dismayed to find they are rats with a thyroid condition. Lisa and Mrs. Ziffel Become Tycoons -- Lisa Douglas has an unexpected windfall when she discovers her hots cake is a cure for the thyroid problem. Maude and Viv Learn Judo -- Still reeling from Hubie Binder's obscene phone calls, Maude and Vivian take a self defense course. Felix & The Military Academy -- Felix Unger is appalled by the conditions when he visits his sun Leonard at his new military school. Florence Henderson Plays Florence Nightingale -- Carol Brady nurses Alice back to health after Sam has an unfortunate meat cleaver incident. Just when i was thinking you couldn't top yourself!! These are ALL great, and I never use the term lol, but.....LOL!! It's hard to pick a favorite out of these, but the visual of Maude and Vivian doing judo is topped only by the Back-to-the-Future-esque Mothers In Law episode. Brilliant! Mary Tyler Moore and Ed Asner in the feature film "Mr.Grant Takes Richards". Lou and Mary consummate their relationship and the rest of the movie consists of awkward pauses. "Carol and Wilbur Have a Horse Guest" No one is more surprised than Ed when "him" becomes pregnant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted March 31, 2011 Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 "Carol and Wilbur Have a Horse Guest" No one is more surprised than Ed when "him" becomes pregnant. SO WHO PLAYS THE SHORT BILL FRAWLEY GUEST ROLE ON THIS OPUS OF YOURS? My Friend Flicka? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 'MORETHANONESUBJECT' "Carol and Wilbur Have a Horse Guest" No one is more surprised than Ed when "him" becomes pregnant. SO WHO PLAYS THE SHORT BILL FRAWLEY GUEST ROLE ON THIS OPUS OF YOURS? My Friend Flicka? No, that was "Our Own Whirling Jet" in his last TV appearance. The old nag was never able to parlay his appearance on the highest rated special of 1958 into a viable career, started hanging around with 'horses of a different color' snorting fermented hay and it all went downhill. When last heard from, he had made a stag reel with Mimi Van Tyson. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Re: Brock's episodes: "The Not-So-Popular Mechanic" -- Jack Albertson turns Freddie Prinz over to Immigration Services Gene & The Great Blank Scandal -- In a special edition of 60 Minutes, Mark Goodson and Bill Todman face a class action lawsuit brought against them by several Doras who are actually quite bright. I somehow missed the hilarity of these two on the first reading. Read "bank" for "blank"...but it's too great. I don't get this one: "Jerry Finally Cuts You-Know-Who's Apron Strings" -- Robert Urich begins to wonder what he did to deserve being cast on Emeril Lagasse's sitcom. Was Robert Urich really in that Emeril sitcom? (and was his character's name Jerry?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Brock writes: "Jonathan Moves Out" -- Angela Bower drives her son out of the house after thinking he was out all night with a writer. With a BEARD, yet! What show is this from? Is the son (Jonathan) gay? Or did he date masculine women (guest star: Nancy McKeon?)? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 31, 2011 Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 "Mary Locks Mr. Grant in the Film Vault" however this being the racy 70s they play the strip version of "Who's in the Barnyard?". The vault opens with Lou in his boxers so Sue Ann rushes in and closes the door behind them. :marionstrong: Was Robert Urich really in that Emeril sitcom? (and was his character's name Jerry?) Yes, and Yes! LOL Suzuki Puts Bleeker Street on the Map -- Suzuki Bean is taken into custody by Child Protective Services after her parents take she and her sidekick to a love-in to broaden their horizons. Guest Star: Jimmy Garrett. Bee, and the Barbershop Quartet -- Aunt Bee and Floyd recruit Gomer to make their musical duo for the annual Lions Club picnic a terriffic trio. When the locals find out Thelma Lou has invited her Ukranian uncle Lawrence all of Mayberry vies to make the group a quartet and hit the big time. Pete's Other Wife -- When Pete and Gladys go away for a two-week vacation, Lily Ruskin and Hilda Crocker volunteer to water their plants while they're away. While Lily is tending to Gladys' prized rubber plant, a snooping Hilda opens the basement door and discovers Gladys isn't the only member of the Porter family nobody has ever seen. Jessica & The Golden Greek -- In this episode of Murder, She Wrote, Amos Tupper (Tom Bosley) returns to Cabot Cove and discovers a golden statue of Aristotle, stolen decades ago in a brazen heist from NY's Metropolitian Museum, on display in Jessica Fletcher's (Angela Lansbury) living room. This kicks off a series of events that culminates in a search of the Fletcher house, resulting in solid evidence that Jessica has framed over 200 individuals for murder over the past 12 years, muders committed by her own hand. Alicia Helps Helen Thomas -- Crack nonogenarian political reporter Helen Thomas hires the Good Wife's equally crack team of lawyers to defend her against allegations of antisemitism. It is revealed during depositions that Helen ushered Alicia's (Julianna Margulies) husband Peter (Chris Noth) into manhood in the mid-60s. Chrissy, the Thighmaster -- Chrissy Snow turns an extra large pair of lobster crackers into the latest exercise craze. Natalie Meets Andy Rooney -- It's sweeps week for the Facts of Life team and the show is pulling out all the stops. When aspiring reporter Natalie lands a coveted internship at 60 Minutes, she is dismayed to learn her duties are limited to getting coffee and grooming Andy Rooney's eyebrows. Sue Ann & Bob Crane -- On a promotional tour of Minneapolis, Bob Crane is introduced to Happy Homemaker Sue Ann Nivens and it is a match made in kinky heaven! But this stirs up unexpected jealousy from Lou. Kurt and the Plummer -- In looking over a backlog of their old contracts, lawyers for 20th Century Fox discover a loophole in Christopher Plummer's contract obligating him to promote the Sound of Music for the rest of his life. To his dismay, is cast in a multi-episode arc of Glee as the school janitor who is inspired by music to complete his high school diploma. Drew Saves Christopher Plummer (a.k.a. Celebrity Rehab: Senior Edition) -- After being forced to get down to the insipid Born This Way, Mr. Plummer develops a substance abuse problem and Dr. Drew is the only one to help. Other stars heading in for rehab this season: Betty White, Wilford Brimley, Luise Rainer and Joyce Bulifant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Posted March 31, 2011 Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Brock writes: "Jonathan Moves Out" -- Angela Bower drives her son out of the house after thinking he was out all night with a writer. With a BEARD, yet! What show is this from? Is the son (Jonathan) gay? Or did he date masculine women (guest star: Nancy McKeon?)? :lucyhaha: This is from Who's The Boss. I believe the actor who played Judith Light's son came out of the closet several years ago and now sells tupperware. Or something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C L A U D E Posted March 31, 2011 Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 :lucyhaha: This is from Who's The Boss. I believe the actor who played Judith Light's son came out of the closet several years ago and now sells tupperware. Or something. Yes, maybe that's where Tony Danza learned his homophobia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted April 1, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 Brock's 'Sue Ann & Bob Crane' -- The title of this one says it all!! "Roseanne Waits Up for DJ/Roseanne and Superman/Roseanne is an Astronaut" Roseanne gets Superman (Dean Cain) for DJ's birthday party and promises she won't be there to interfere. After Cain bows out Roseanne wedges herself into the Superman costume and sneaks back into the house. But when Dan shoves her out of the second story window, a bad bounce on the trampoline sends her into orbit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted April 1, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 "Blanche's Electric Vibrator" Blanche tries out her new sex toy right after Rose has over-waxed the floors and vibrates half-way to New Rochelle. :marionstrong: I bow to the obscurity and hilarity of this one: Suzuki Puts Bleeker Street on the Map -- Suzuki Bean is taken into custody by Child Protective Services after her parents take she and her sidekick to a love-in to broaden their horizons. Guest Star: Jimmy Garrett. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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